Rosie taking on Lou's discrimination lawsuit against BonzAir
Pepper trying to convince Lyn that nothing 'dodgy' is going on just because Paul and Rosie have gone missing while together
Paul can't get the code to work so realises that he and Rosie are stuck together until morning
The Wine Cellar™
Paul has recovered remarkably from the bout of claustrophobia he had at the end of yesterday's episode.Rosie says it's understandable that he's be scared and Paul tells her that he got stuck in a mine shaft once. Rosie wonders it that's how Paul lost half his leg, but he says no, that was a whole different thing altogether.
ROSIE: That's quite a life you've had.
PAUL: Yeah, I've never really quite worked out whether I attract trouble or trouble attracts me.
Paul offers Rosie the wine bottle he's got, but she turns it down saying she prefers to keep a clear head.
PAUL: Even at $500 a pop?
Rosie gets a bit frustrated and reckons at least one of the guests in the restaurant would have ordered wine by now so that they can get out soon. Paul tells her that it would depend on the customers for the night though, most of them are happy with the cheaper stuff they have up in the bar and don't bother with the expensive stuff which is the only kind they keep down in the cellar. Rosie then realises that Paul wasn't joking when he said they'd be stuck down there all night and she gladly accepts when he offers her some wine.
The House of the Two Robinsons and the Two Scullys
Lyn and Oscar are at the kitchen table dipping bits of toast in runny egg yolk (the egg is in a cup to make the dipping easier). They're just about to feed TeddyTheTeddyBear™ when Elle arrives home with shopping bags in hand meanwhile Lyn keeps dipping and dipping and dipping this one piece of toast in the egg yolk.
ELLE: Where's Dad?
LYN: Don't know!
LYN: I really have no idea.
ELLE: Have you two had a fight or something?
LYN: No! He's just disappeared.
Cue Janet and Ingo making the cutest faces ever at each other.
Elle asks when Lyn last saw Paul and she says it was this afternoon at Lassiters when he was showing Rosie around. Lyn tells Elle about Rosie winning the traineeship at Lassiters and Elle says that she's very lucky then and gives Lyn a knowing look, suggesting that the traineeship might involve some um, extracurricular activities.
LYN: That's ridiculous! Elle, he wouldn't!
ELLE: No, he wouldn't.
LYN: In the old days, maybe.
Lyn keeps trying to rationalise things to herself and keep up her trust in Paul despite his past record.
LYN: Well, of course, like... He'll be married in a minute. He had a suit fitting today!
A suit fitting, eh? That's got to be the best reason I've ever heard as to why he wouldn't get up to anything! LOL
Elle asks if Lyn's tried Paul's mobile and she says she just goes straight through to the message bank. Together they decided that it's too early to panic if Paul's been in an accident and set a timer to ring in two hours' time. If he isn't home by that time then 'his goose is cooked'!
The House of Newbies
Frazer is putting some tools into what looks like one of Steph's baby belts (I'm guessing they have some spares now that they lost the patent) and drops the hammer on his foot as he tries to put it in the belt. Ouch. Carmella and Will arrive home, carrying a big Christmas tree, and Will notices how Frazer's fixed the hole in the wall in the passageway from the hallway into the living room. Will asks some probing questions regarding the wall fixing which Frazer does his best to answer (albeit not very convincingly) and then Carmella finds a business card from BarryTheHandyman™. Uh-oh, busted! Carmella realises that Frazer was just putting on an act to be handy in order to impress Rosie and she tells him she thinks that's really sweet.
The Wine Cellar™
Rosie says Lyn must be worried by now and Paul agrees, and it's just before the wedding too.
ROSIE: How did you know that she was The One™?
PAUL: I had a few trial runs.
ROSIE: But this time it was different?
PAUL: I watched her transform. See, when I first met Lyn she was just, I don't know, just a mum.
ROSIE: Just a mum? A little patronising, don't you think?
PAUL: (with a dreamy look on his face) See, I saw an ambition to her that wasn't being realised and I encouraged it. I watched her strength and spirit and confidence blossom 'til one day I realised that I couldn't live without her.
PAUL: OK, your turn.
ROSIE: Nothing much to tell.
PAUL: Come on, I've just let my heart bleed all over my sleeve. I think it's only fair that you do the same. Tell me about your first great love.
ROSIE: Oh, you know... He was witty and handsome and...
PAUL: Not The One™?
ROSIE: I'm determined that nothing but the deepest love could ever induce me into matrimony.
PAUL: Really? And just where is Mr. Darcy now?
ROSIE: (laughs) You know Pride and Prejudice?
PAUL: Oh yeah, Lyn's got the entire series on DVD. Oh, she and Elle have Elizabeth and Darcy on continuous loop. It's all feather pens and heaving bosoms at our place.
ROSIE: Well, now you know. I'm in love with Mr. Darcy.
PAUL: Yeah, hate to tell you this but- he doesn't exist!
ROSIE: Exactly. Sad, isn't it?
PAUL: So come on, there must have been someone?
ROSIE: Can we talk about something else?
PAUL: School girl crush?
ROSIE: (picks up a bottle of wine to change the subject) Do you sell much of this one?
PAUL: You've never...?
PAUL: Not even...?
ROSIE: Can we just drop it!
Paul then puts on TheSmirk™ that he usually does when he finds something intriguing.
The House of the Two Robinsons and the Two Scullys
While waiting for Paul to come home and the timer to go off, Lyn and Elle do the best they can to amuse themselves by watching Pride and Prejudice. I can't remember there ever being a TV in the no. 22 living room before (although we have seen the remotes lying around as recently as the other week) though, hmm.
LYN: He even looks a bit like a Darcy, don't you think?
ELLE: (not really listening) Yeah...
LYN: It's not many men who would fall in love with a woman's strength, you know.
LYN: I can't believe I've actually found him, my very own Mr. Darcy.
ELLE: You mean Dad?
LYN: Who else?
Elle thought Lyn was talking about Dylan and Lyn says that he's not exactly a Darcy because he doesn't respect her strength, he uses it. Elle's bemused to hear this and says that Dylan treats her fine despite what Lyn thinks. Lyn reckons Elle deserves better than Dylan, someone like Will would be better. Elle says it's bad enough that her Dad is always bagging Dylan and she doesn't need her stepmum-to-be to go on about it as well. Just then the timer they set goes off and they get ready to go out looking for Paul.
The Wine Cellar™
Rosie's banging on the door, calling out for help. Paul calmly tells her that there's no need for her to feel embarrassed over her lack of experience with the opposite sex. Rosie pretends not to know what he's talking about, but he knows better.
PAUL: Look, you're embarrassed because you chose a successful career over romance.
ROSIE: You think I'm successful?
PAUL: Yeah, I don't think you need me to tell you that.
ROSIE: So you don't think I'm a freak then?
PAUL: Why? Because you chose a career over throwing yourself at the first Tom, Dick or Harry that came along?
ROSIE: Most people don't get me at all.
PAUL: I'm not most people.
ROSIE: No, you're not.
Rosie's getting cold and Paul offers her his suit jacket. He gets in really close, but stops himself before he gets too close and just then the lights go out too. Rosie says there's got to be a signal for the mobiles somewhere and checks her phone again.
The Bachelor Pad Formerly Known As Toadie's Office
Toadie's entertaining himself by throwing some dog food to Bob who's on the couch. Harold and Lou appear and make faces of disgust as they see the complete mess that's in the office. If the StinkyBaboonSmell™ that was there yesterday still remains then I think I would too. The older men have come to see Rosetta and Toadie says he hasn't seen her either. He's also a bit annoyed with her not consulting him before taking on new clients.
LOU: She stood us up!
TOADIE: Well, why don't you see someone who's actually got it together enough to look after your needs?
LOU: Who might that be?
TOADIE: Tada! Come on, I have nothing else to do! I have no life! So who's doing what to who and who's paying?
LOU: Ever heard of BonzAir?
TOADIE: The airline?
LOU: I want to take them for every cent they've got!
TOADIE: Hold there, hold there...
TOADIE: I'm gonna need some pants for this. (stands up to reveal that he's just in his white boxers with red, blue and pink dots on them)
The House of Newbies
Will and Carmella are finalising putting the Christmas tree up and celebrate the completion with a kiss, just as Frazer appears from the hallway. He's dressed up and does the old 'I-spray-some-perfume-in-the-air-then-walk-through-the-cloud-of-perfume-so-that-it's-applied-evenly' trick and Will and Carmella have a laugh about it. Carmella comments on how Frazer's so persistent with Rosie, most men would have given up by now, and Frazer tells that other men can have her. A good gambler knows when to leave the table and that's what he's doing. There won't be any hardship with sharing a house with Rosie either because he's moving out.
The Scarlet Bar
Boyd arrives at the bar and tells Steph about his extremely tiring day- he had a nap on the couch, made himself a toastie and watched some TV. Despite his busy schedule his step-mum puts him to work though. They walk into the office and Boyd wants to know what the latest goss is.
STEPH: Mum was in here earlier. She seems to have misplaced Paul somewhere.
BOYD: Oh, yeah? What's the bad news?
STEPH: You haven't seen him anywhere, have you?
BOYD: No, I spend most of my time trying to avoid that guy.
Steph tells Boyd that there's a message for him from Glenn aka. CuteGirlFromTassie™ and Boyd plays along when Steph assumes Glenn is a guy. Apparently 'he' called this arvo and wanted to speak to Boyd and asked for him to call back as soon as he could. Boyd just tells Steph that Glenn was someone he met when he was down in Tassie looking for Max and that 'he' 'is just a friend, really'. Maybe it was just me then, but I definitely remember seeing Boyd have flashbacks to doing more than that with Glenn (cf. 5097
The House of Newbies
Will and Carmella hadn't really finished with the Christmas tree after all, it seems, because they now have to choose between putting an angel or a star on top of it. Carmella picks the angel and I can't help but wonder if this is somehow related to her leaving the church. She comments on how she feels bad about Frazer having to be alone at Christmas, but Will ensures her that Frazer will be fine. Will moves in for a hug, but Carmella pulls away, worried that Frazer might see them and feel even worse about being alone. Not to worry though for Frazer waltzes in whistling a happy tune with a suitcase that he'll use to pack his stuff in and he tells the 'lovebirds' not to mind him at all. Carmella's puzzled over Frazer's cheerfulness just as he comes back in and plays suitcase basketball with his socks (he throws them into the bag like they were balls).
CARMELLA: So you think he might just be hiding a broken heart?
WILL: How do I know?
CARMELLA: Well, why don't you say something to him?
WILL: That's not how blokes talk.
CARMELLA: Well, maybe they should start.
When Frazer comes back again after picking up something else form his room that's going in his bag Carmella urges Will to go up and talk to him and which is very awkward for Will.
WILL: I know you're going through a tough time, mate.
Tentatively, he puts his hand on Frazer's shoulder.
WILL: So if you ever need someone to...
FRAZER: Yeah, thanks, mate. If you could swap (?) me fifty that would be tops! Moving just bleeds you dry!
CARMELLA: He meant someone to talk to...
CARMELLA: ...Since you're obviously so broken-hearted.
CARMELLA: Are you?
FRAZER: (not really serious) Yeah, for sure. Yeah, I'm the sad clown. Laughing on the outside, but in here (points to his heart) you don't want to know.
And with that he grabs his suitcase and leaves, whistling that happy tune again. When he gets to the door, Elle's there and wants to know if her Dad is there. Elle runs into the living room, calling out for her Paul and Rosie.
FRAZER: Sorry, she's not here. She's not home from work yet.
ELLE: Yeah, either is Dad.
FRAZER: What are you saying?
ELLE: Well, that they're both missing.
CARMELLA: What should we do?
ELLE: We find them now.
The Lassiters Complex
A distressed Lyn tells Steph that she's tried every emergency department in the area, but no one has any information about Paul.
STEPH: Mum, they've only been gone a few hours. There's probably a perfectly logical explanation.
LYN: It's Paul you're talking about. Nothing's ever simple. Steph, he's made a lot of enemies.
STEPH: He also makes friends very well too.
Lyn wants to know what that's supposed to mean, but Steph just shrugs it off. Their conversation is interrupted as Elle arrives with Will, Frazer and Carmella in tow. Elle tells her step-mum-to-be that there's no signs of Paul everywhere and no one had heard from him. Frazer says Rosie missed her appointment with Lou at the law firm too.
LYN: It doesn't make sense! How can two people just disappear?
FRAZER: When was the last time you saw them?
LYN: About three o'clock. I sent them on a tour of the hotel.
FRAZER: There's a smart idea. Talk about throwing the lamb to the slaughter.
LYN: What do you mean?
FRAZER: Well, Paul Robinson... I mean, the man is legendary, isn't he?
LYN: And you're saying...?
FRAZER: No offence, I know you're marrying him, but take a look at his form. He'd better not have touched Rosie or I will have him for breakf...
That was the sound of Lyn's palm (supposedly) hitting Frazer's cheek at full force.
LYN: You're talking about my fiancé!
Lyn and Steph start to walk away as Frazer is left behind, his cheek very sore, possibly rightly so.
The Scarlet Bar Office
Boyd's on the phone to Glenn aka. CuteGirlFromTassie™, telling her that them having their separate lives is how it has to be and he begs her not to call him anymore. Steph overhears the last bit as she comes in and Boyd quickly makes his excuses and hang up. She tells Boyd that Glenn sure sounded like a good mate and Boyd admits that she's actually a girl, not a guy like he said before, and tells her that it was all innocent down in Tassie.
Steph asks why Boyd made her think that Glenn was a guy by not correcting her before, especially if it was all so innocent. Boyd says it's OK and that Janae knows all about it.
STEPH: Mate, look, there's no need to stress about this sort of thing.
BOYD: I'm not stressing.
STEPH: You met a girl in Tassie, you had a bit of fun. That's OK, that's what normal 19-year-olds do. The thing is though, you're not a normal 19-year-old, are you? You're married.
BOYD: I love Janae.
STEPH: Yeah, I know you do. I know you do. But look, mate, most people spend years in and out of relationships before they find the right person that they want to settle down with.
BOYD: I guess I just got lucky then.
STEPH: Yeah, you did. And I hope you remember that because it takes a lot more than love to keep a relationship on track. It's bloody hard work!
BOYD: Have a listen to you.
BOYD: It's like Dad never left.
The Bachelor Pad Formerly Known As Toadie's Office
An excited Toadie gets off the phone and tells a yet-to-be-excited Harold and Lou that they've got four journos and three photographers coming over.
LOU: What are you talking about?
TOADIE: It's a question of tactics.
LOU: Ah, you mean court strategies?
TOADIE: Court? Are you kidding? Do you know how expensive that is?
HAROLD: Rosetta seemed to think Lou had a very good case!
TOADIE: Well, Rosetta is but a mere baby! Shows much promise, but much to learn she has. I look forward to teaching her...
LOU: Toadie, get to the point!
TOADIE: BonzAir can afford to go to court. They can afford the top silks who can afford the ajournments and delays et cetera et cetera. What they can't afford and what they'll avoid at all costs is bad publicity.
Cue major 'Aaah's from Lou and Harold.
TOADIE: BonzAir gets a bad rep and they're cactus, and they know it!
Toadie goes on to talk about how Lou has great potential to become a great 'trolley dolly' and how he's blatantly been discriminated against on the count of ageism.
TOADIE: We'll invite the boss of BonzAir here and put a gun to his head!
LOU: We're what?
TOADIE: The metaphorical gun of bad publicity! He'll be back-tracking so fast you'll be wearing out the carpet on the route to Moscow before he can say 'glasnost'!
The Next Morning At The Bachelor Pad Formerly Known As Toadie's Office
Toadie, Lou and Harold are talking to the CEO of BonzAir who claims his company believes they had every right to deny Lou employment with them since he didn't fit into the strict criteria for their employees.
TOADIE: They are?
MR BONZAIR: Stamina, for a start. Flying is a rigorous business.
TOADIE: So physical fitness is important?
MR BONZAIR: Exactly.
TOADIE: Well, lucky for my client his latest medical results were excellent.
MR BONZAIR: We also require prior experience.
MR BONZAIR: Well, dealing with the public.
MR BONZAIR: Amongst other things.
TOADIE: Well then you would have also noted on Mr. Carpenter's impressive CV that he ran his own successful hotel for a number of years and he's currently employed in the catering industry.
MR BONZAIR: I said amongst other things.
TOADIE: You mean he's not female, 25 and legs up to here! (gestures with his hand up to shoulder height)
Now Mr. BonzAir has had enough and gets up to leave, telling Toadie that he's sorry his client (Lou) didn't get the job but that he can console himself that there were 50 other applicants who were also unsuccessful. Toadie reminds the BonzAir guy that there were witnesses present who heard Lou being 'accused' of having a pacemaker, but Mr. BonzAir says that was just a meaningless, throw-away remark on which they've built the whole case. As he opens the door to leave he finds himself facing the flashes from the photpgraphers' cameras and all the journos' questions from Toadie's arrangement. Mr. BonzAir then realises he's trapped and tells Toadie they might have more to discuss about Lou's case after all.
TOADIE: Lou Carpenter wants to be a flight attendant, not a catwalk model. I think it's clear to everybody here why he didn't get the job. You couldn't have based it your decision on anything other than appearances in the three minute interview you granted him.
MR BONZAIR: Perhaps we can come to a financial arrangement.
LOU: It's not about the money, it's about work and dignity. Mr. Peris, I want the job I applied for and I want the Moscow route.
MR BONZAIR: I admire your determination, Mr. Carpenter. Call me this afternoon and we'll organise a place in the training program.
Mr. BonzAir leaves and Toadie's shocked.
TOADIE: Are you kidding me? The Lou Carpenter I know would sell his grandmother for a tenner!
LOU: That Lou hadn't met Mishka!
TOADIE: I don't know why I bother!
The Wine Cellar™
Paul watches Rosie as she wakes up from her slumber and she notices how he's shivering so offers him to have his jacket back, but he says he'll be fine anyway. She offers to share it with him and he says he can't. Rosie asks why not and Paul asks her in return if he has to spell it out to her for her to understand. A light bulb goes off in Rosie's head and she concludes that them being trapped down in the cellar was a set up by Paul so that he could have one last fling before the wedding by some weird fantasy of his.
Paul is thinking along the same lines.
PAUL: So why haven't I made a move then?
ROSIE: Because you're waiting for me to throw myself at you. The homewrecker, poor blameless you.
PAUL: What do you want me to say?
ROSIE: Why not try being honest?
Paul stands up and walks up to Rosie so that they stand only centimeters apart. He leans in to kiss her, then pulls back and hesitates for a second before kissing her.The Scarlet Bar
Lyn's talking to Carmella and Elle, telling them it's not like Paul to be out all night without telling her where he is and who he's with. Boyd's at the bar and comments to Steph that it would be more Paul's style to just lie about it instead. Cut back to Lyn again saying that she's sure something's happened, that's why Paul hasn't contacted her. Boyd remarks that he wouldn't bet on it, but they can only hope that Lyn's right. Steph shushes him and tells him Lyn might hear him.
BOYD: You know as well as me that he could be off doing anything with anyone.
STEPH: Well, she's convinced that he's changed.
BOYD: He hasn't, believe me, I know.
BOYD: Everyone knows.
STEPH: Yeah, well I wanna believe he's changed too, just for her sake.
BOYD: You're all so desperate for a happy ending you're willing to believe the lies, just like Lyn is.
STEPH: I hope you're wrong.
BOYD: We both know that I'm not.
STEPH: Oh God, if he does anything to hurt my Mum.
STEPH: I'd be capable of anything.
The Wine Cellar™
We return to the cellar onto to find Paul and Rosie at it. Just when it seems Paul will eat Rosie alive, one of the Lassiters employees, that guy who's always in the reception when they have scenes there, comes in and finds his boss standing between Rosie legs, his tie undone and her skirt hiked up so far we can see most of her legs. I bet that's a sight most Lassiters employees don't get every day!
Upon the employee's 'Sorry, sir', Paul quickly moves away from Rosie and yells at his underling that he and Rosie have been locked in the cellar all night almost accusatory as if this guy's responsible for it. Putting his jacket on while ranting about how security is so bad at Lassiters these days, how he nearly froze to death and how he can think of much better ways to spend his evenings, Paul makes his way out of the cellar. A desolate and confused Rosie quietly grabs her handbag and makes her way out of the cellar as well.