- Ned handing Paul a parking ticket.
- Lou vowing to find £10,000 for true love.
- Kim and Janelle finding out that Bree is not their child.
Ned and Paul have a fight with the wheelie bin – Ned wants to ‘help' Paul but Paul isn't having anything of it. The tussle culminates in Paul falling, flat onto his back on the ground.
Paul is not impressed and threatens police involvement but Ned doesn't think he stands a chance. Paul tells him that he knows how to play these games and Neddy is nothing but an amateur! Ned is going off for a jog but tells Paul to let Izzy know he'll be back in half an hour as she likes him ‘sweaty'. Yuck. Paul stares at him as he leaves, shooting daggers.
Connor appears and berates Ned for his Travis Bickle moment. Then he tries to persuade him to join the HoT egg hunt but Ned doesn't want to join in. Connor tells him that the Simon Cowell-inspired Mr Nasty act is getting old and he's starting to sound like Scrooge – Toadie wouldn't be like this. Connor calls Toad but Toadie can't talk for long and, after hanging up, Connor murmurs to himself that he's so lonely…
Janelle is talking about the white-coated morons who messed up their DNA tests. Kim is more cautious, saying they didn't get it wrong the first time: this test backs it up. Janelle reminds him of when she was in labour. Kim tells her that the margin for it being wrong is so small they shouldn't even think about it being anything but correct.
KIM: We've got a problem here.
Bree thinks Janae looks like a dork in her skirt and blouse. Janae is still getting used to being a preppie and reading about the World Bank and the IMF. Bree knows all about the IMF and the EU and Parliament and wonders why Janae is trying to do this when she's so obviously clueless; Boyd won't buy it. Janae is doing it for herself, not Boyd. She's so tired of being looked down on. Bree wishes she could be like Janae; she might not be school smart but she's smart. Janae spots an ad for a Young Liberals meeting and thinks she should go. This prompts Bree to give her sister some short-cuts to being smart, just what Janae wanted.
Boyd and Sasha are studying at the kitchen table and this sight cheers RandomMax™ to no end. Boyd shoots him a look and Max starts to talk about salt-reduced sauce and shows no signs of stopping until Boyd offers to put away the shopping to get him out of the room.
Boyd says he's still feeling guilty about his break-up with Janae. Sasha goes all “Oh Boyd” and puts a hand on his arm. Boyd thinks it's probably for the best, with them being so different and everything. Sasha decides to stick around with him instead of going and meeting Ethan. Boyd tries to convince her that he's okay but she ends up staying to do more study.
Harold spots an email Lou has been composing to Mishka – telling her he hasn't heard from her and is missing their spark - and asks Lou what he was doing but Lou tells him not to look as it's none of his beeswax. Harold deletes the email before Lou can send it and tells him it's pathetic: after the Trixie business he'd thought he'd learned his lesson. Lou asks if he could forgive a man some hope. Harold relents a little but says they can't mope around. He'll organise a distraction – delivering pamphlets to letterboxes! Lou thinks this has further dented his self-respect: that job is for little kids! Harold says he's organised something rather exciting and beckons him outside for a look.
Kim is trying to think back but Janelle was off her skull on painkillers. They showed her to Janelle after she was born and she looked so perfect. Then she was taken away. Kim remembers too – she wasn't breathing too well so she was taken away to get checked out and then they brought her back, half an hour later. Janelle thinks they couldn't have someone else's kid but Kim has read stories before: it happens.
Bree bursts in and thinks they're fighting again but Janelle tells her they aren't and, hugging her, promises never to put them through it again because they love them – all of them.
Harold has a surprise for Lou – a classic motorbike and sidecar combo. Lou is dead against going anywhere near it. Harry thinks it'll just be like ‘Easy Rider' but then Lou reminds him how that movie ended (not well) and marches off.
Meanwhile Janae is asking Connor about Global Warming (as Paul walks up behind them). Connor hasn't much to say but checks they're still on for Friday (they are). Paul catches Connor and Connor apologises for Ned's crazy behaviour. Paul knows he's not involved and wants to engage Connor's services: he wants him to follow Ned. He flashes a lot of cash and tells Connor to name his own price, as Ned does stretches behind him in the distance, looking at them every now and then. Connor looks from Ned to Paul.
Janae and Bree are laughing as they recount a story to Kim and Janelle. Janelle tries to get them to stay longer with promises of more dessert but they're going to see a documentary. Janelle and Kim are very attentive and helpful and Janae and Bree can't help but notice that something very strange is going on.
Once they've gone Kim tells Janelle that the hospital referred him to their legal department – he thinks they're more paranoid about being sued than acting like they know they've done something wrong. Janelle's been looking in Bree's baby book and it mentions her midwife – Louise Fletcher. Maybe they should track her down. Kim reminds her it could be difficult and it's a long time ago. Janelle has connections and thinks Louise is living in their area now. Kim is being cautious but Janelle thinks it's worth a shot.
Sasha admits to Boyd that Ethan has become possessive since she started uni – as if she's going to run off with the first boy she meets. RandomMax™ randomly appears as she mentions about meeting up later. Boyd thinks they should try the Scarlet Bar and Max talks it up a bit. They arrange to meet up and Sasha leaves. Time for Max to give his two cents (“If that girl was any keener, she'd explode”), only for Boyd to tell him to shut up.
Ned is telling Lou that delivering papers is a dead cert for meeting laydees. Connor thinks he'd look hot on a motorbike. Lou thanks Ned for the new angle on the situation and dashes off.
Connor asks Ned why he's jumped on the HoT bandwagon and is winding up Lou instead of trying to defend him from such things. Ned wants to have a bit of fun but Connor reminds him that this isn't like him and he wants the old Ned back in all his uncomplicated and predictable glory. Ned can't help him: that bloke's gone. Connor tells him about Paul wanting him to tail Ned and Ned tells him to take all the money, and more, if he can – he's got him rattled!
The new and improved EvilishNed™ is striking a deal with Connor to get half of his money from his deal with Paul. Connor warns him not to mess with Izzy again as things could get nasty. Ned knows what he's doing. Connor spots that there's going to be an open-mike night on at the bar – maybe Ned can go and sing! But…
(Concentrate – you're going to want to read this bit)
NED: Mate, my singing career is over.
Connor looks a bit troubled for some reason.
Sasha and Boyd walk in. Sasha has just broken up with her boyfriend but she thinks it's the right decision. It was his jealously that persuaded her to end it. Boyd gave her the inspiration; it's so funny that they're in the same boat at the same time, like the universe is trying to tell them something. Boyd hopes she's not some mad hippie type but she says she isn't. But she's glad he's here for her.
She tries to kiss him but he pulls away. She smiles and he gives her a strange smile back.
Kim and Janelle are here to see Louise Fletcher. Kim reassures Janelle that they'll deal with it together, calming her nerves slightly. A woman comes out and Kim introduces himself and Janelle. Louise tells them that she isn't meant to speak to them and hurries away but Kim tries to get her to talk to them. She says that the hospital said it was a matter for the lawyers and the Timmins will have to speak to them. Janelle appeals to her mothering instinct, saying her beautiful girl might not even be her's…The nurse can't imagine it but she can't get involved. Janelle pleads with her to talk but to no avail.
Boyd tells Max about Sasha making the moves on him, as Janae had suspected she would. He stuffed up – Janae was smarter than he gave her credit for. Max reminds him that there were other problems in his relationship with Janae and not to forget that. He suggests he take some time out to enjoy himself.
Outside Louise Fletcher's House
Kim suggests they go to Colac to confront ‘the mongrels' but Janelle knows they would only fob them off. She knows Louise wanted to tell them something. Kim says she's been scared off but they'll get Toad onto it.
Louise appears, saying she couldn't let them leave like this. She admits that she thinks there might have been a mix-up: when their little one was brought in for breathing trouble she was put next to a newborn with the same problem and then an emergency came in, meaning she didn't have time to do the ID bracelets. She had a feeling she'd hear about it again, one day, so she wrote both the names down on a sheet of paper. She hands it to them, so they can find out the truth. She tells them how sorry she is.
Connor is filming Lou and Harold getting prepared to jump onto the motorbike and sidecar. While Harry has a leather jacket on Lou is dressed smartly in a casual suit, which Harry isn't happy about.
Connor spots Ned and films him as Ned protests.
Bree and Janae discuss their parents' behaviour: they know something's up. Boyd comes over and Bree makes herself scarce. Boyd notices Janae's new look: her hair in a bun and a longer school dress with white long socks and sensible black shoes. Boyd says he won't be seeing Sasha again for a while and Janae realises that she was right: she hopes they'll be very happy together. Boyd asks if she really thinks he'd get it on with the first girl who'd crack onto him? Janae was expecting it – she knows he has the hots for Sasha. Boyd had been coming over to apologise but, if that's what she thinks, maybe they should forget about it.
Kim is faking a new DNA result on the computer for Bree to take to school. Kim asks if Janelle's still okay with this and Janelle thinks that it's best; the other girl would never really be theirs, anyway. They'd be total strangers. Kim thinks she'd be so happy with the other family, just as Bree is happy with them. Janelle adds that she'd have no idea how to tell Bree – it would be the end of her world. Kim hands her the forgery. No one will ever know.
JANELLE: And that's the way it's gonna stay. She's our little girl.