Ned tells Izzy that they either go to Sydney tonight or he's going to the cops
Katya's fighting Susan for custody of Zeke and Rachel
Angie's made the boys brekkie but Connor doesn't want any. He's surprised to hear that Ned's gone to Sydney – he breaks hearts and then skips town, what a bloke. He's also surprised to hear about Elle giving Stu an exotic dance – although nothing happened between them. Ned doesn't know about Elle's feelings for Stu, although Stu probably shouldn't have told Toad about the whole thing as he can't keep a secret to save himself. Toadie's phone rings: it's Katya, wanting to meet Toad for lunch at the Scarlet Bar. He checks his invisible palm pilot and they arrange to meet. Toadie's very excited about it and yells at Angie to get out the shower (It's at this point I notice (how didn't I notice earlier?) that Stu is very gratuitously bare-chested). The boys talk about what Katya is up to: Stu, using his cop-sense, knows Katya doesn't want to go out with Toad and the meeting must be down to something else. Connor thinks cops are just glorified traffic cones: private eyes are real good at reading people and Katya is attracted to Toadie. They come up with a challenge and decide to follow Toadie on his lunch to find out who's right. Don't they have better things to do?
Susan lets Lance Armstrong into the house. Alas, not Lance, but Karl in cycle gear. He's wants to know how the Katya situation is going: nothing more has been said so Susan hopes the custody threat was just a heat of the moment thing. She admits to Karl that part of her wishes Katya never came back, just in time for Zeke to overhear, in true soap fashion. Susan wants her in the kids' lives but this stress isn't good for anyone. Karl reminds her that she's had to grieve for Alex twice and they must remember this. Susan hopes they get through it all soon.
Toadie arrives – he's brought carnations for Katya and tells her how excited he was that she a called. At the door Cop-Stu and Private-Eye-Connor keep an eye on them but have to go in to get a better look and listen. Toadie asks why she wanted to meet and she goes on about needing someone to talk to and him seeming approachable even though she doesn't know him that well.
TOADIE: So, how can I help you?
KATYA: Legal advice, actually.
Connor and Stu find this hilarious. Toadie says she can talk legal stuff and any other stuff with him. Katya is going to tell him her problem.
Karl will never guess who Susan bumped into the other day – it wasn't Posh Spice, as Karl thinks but close: Jenny, who was asking after him and was very happy to hear that Karl was still single. Susan quite likes Jenny, despite her dodgy political leanings and her one backfiring joke.
KARL: You do remember why she broke it off with me?
SUSAN: Oh, yes. Because you and I are in love.
Little Zeke hears this all. He comes in and shows a card saying “Back Soon”. He leaves without telling them where he's going. Susan admits that Zeke is talking now but only to Katya and she's a bit jealous. Karl assures her that her being jealous isn't childish and we cut quickly to:
Izzy's off to find a holiday house according to Paul and doesn't buy into Elle's feeling that it was a bit weird she left the same day as Ned. Paul laughs at the suggestion that they ran off together while Elle stares daggers at him.
Meanwhile who do we have but Izzy and Ned in the process of *running off together*. Izzy assures Ned he's going to get the part although he's pretty laid back about it. He has Izzy so he's a winner already: how lovely. But then storm crowds gather: Ned is a bit broke and would like Izzy to pay but she has certain rules she likes her men to abide by:#1 – she never pays. Ned has to hit the old plastic. If that's not enough Izzy wants him to get her some magazines to distract her from “this hideous music collection of yours”. Meow. Ned, with the patience of a saint, actually manages to smile back at her. Izzy looks really pleased with herself, all the way into the ad break.
Stu thinks it's sad that Toadie and Connor thought Katya's motivation could be romance. Connor has a major breakthrough and realises that it's sadder that he and Stu followed Toad to find out such a thing: their lives have come to this.
We focus on Toadie, who's telling Katya that siblings don't always get the upper hand in these cases. Katya can tell he and Susan are close and he tells her that she's like a second mother to him. She turned his life around and she did that for others too. She's a fantastic mother and Rachel and Zeke are very lucky to have her.
Paul is sorry things didn't work for Elle and Ned but she's over his remarks. Paul thinks there's gotta be a great bloke, more suited for her, out there. She knows he's talking about Dylan and he wonders if that's such a bad thought: he has such drive and ambition and Paul-admired qualities in abundance. He doesn't seem to care about Sky. Elle tells him he's a dag.
Toadie is trying to convince Katya that living with Susan and the kids as one big happy family is worth a shot. Then Zeke comes in and leads his sister to the door, telling her it's about Susan.
Rental Tin Can (or the Ned/Izzy car)
Izzy is behaving like a diva of Mariah proportions – she can't believe Ned wants her to stay in this for ten hours straight! She wants a nice luncheon and a nap. Ned suggests she snuggle up in the car if she's tired but his proposal is shot down in flames. He hasn't enough money to pay for a motel. Izzy thinks this one will have to do and encourages him to get out and get it sorted.
Karl is still in his cycling getup: Susan should really get him a new top for his birthday, maybe in a nice Lance-like yellow, but Susie seems to care more about Karl and Jenny than what his cycling gear. Karl brings up what Jenny thinks about him and Susan and Susan reminds him that they know the truth so it shouldn't matter what anyone else thinks: there's nothing between them now. Susan asks if he's going to call her then but Karl tells her to mind her own business.
This looks quite nice for three and a half stars (not the dump Izzy made it out to be anyways). Izzy's asking about the pasta then decides to have steak: medium rare and makes sure the waiter knows exactly what that is. Poor Ned orders “just a ham and cheese toastie” and looks a bit embarrassed to be around her. He tells her she didn't have to be so rude. Izzy, talking loud enough so others might hear, thinks that she still has the right to expect good service, even though they're in ‘Hicksville'. Ned asks her if there's something wrong and knows it's the stress about leaving Paul. Izzy says this is the real Izzy Hoyland (and she has a Julie Cooper-Nicol complex): she is accustomed to a certain type of lifestyle and isn't about to go slumming it now. Ned tries to get her to see he's a bit broke but she has a mini-tantrum, saying her expectations about being looked after might be a bit old fashioned but that's who she is. Love isn't enough – it can't blossom in a cockroach infested bed. Ned has to try harder! Izzy is over dating wannabes, no-hopers and has-beens: he has to be really successful and make lots of money (her words, not mine).
IZZY: And a bit of fame wouldn't go astray either. And you have to keep in shape because, I tell you what, if you start growing man boobs, that's it – I'm outta there and keep yourself nice and me nicer. Understood? Good, excellent, champagne…
Ned really looks confused as we go into ads.
When the food comes Izzy asks for some pepper to ‘disguise the taste' and Ned apologises to the waiter. Izzy yells that he has to apologise for her now as he's “SO EMBARRASSED BY ME?”. People turn and look at them. He tells her to pipe down a little in a perfectly polite fashion. Izzy tells him if he doesn't like her for who she is then maybe they should end it now. Ned knows she's only acting like this as she's going through a rough patch: he loves her passion! He's gonna knock their socks off in Sydney and give her the life she deserves. Izzy's phone rings: it's Paul, wondering how the househunting is going. Elle says hi in the background and Paul tells her not to be away too long. He has to go – he's going to the doctor's as he has a cracking headache. He hangs up but Izzy keeps on talking, with her back to Ned, quickly getting hysterical and asking how long he has. As she does so she dabs water around her eyes to make her look like she's being crying. She hangs up and breaks the news to Ned that Paul's been diagnosed with a brain tumour, then makes him hug her, managing to get in a sneaky half-smile in as he comforts her.
Stu and Connor are still talking about Toadie's love life even though they know they really shouldn't be. Stu says it's much harder to find love than someone simply calling you up and asking you out. Connor thinks his cynicism stems back to Sindi. Stu admits that he was tempted by Elle and wanted to shake things up a bit. He's married and things are meant to be exciting and different but everything's the same. No wife and no excitement – he feels he's in a timewarp. Connor thinks he has to sort it out: Sindi's getting better by the day so why doesn't he sit down with her and talk about the future?
Number 22 – Zen Garden
And Izzy's back home, getting a massage from Paul, who only had eyestrain from too many computer screens (I can sympathise). She thinks they should do the house hunting as a family. Elle appears and wishes Paul wouldn't do that in front of her. She's glad to see Izzy back so soon. Paul tells Izzy of Elle's ‘crazy idea' that Ned and Izzy had run off together. Elle says it was a fleeting thought and she trusts Izzy, totally. Izzy tells her that Elle will find someone better than Ned. Elle is too busy for men and, anyways, has to call Dylan for work (before Paul gets the wrong idea). She has some ideas for the café.
Izzy walks down the driveway and behind some large evergreens to talk to Ned. She tells him that Paul's so weak and they won't know if he'll be alright until they operate. The behaviour wasn't his fault – it was down to the tumour. Ned tries to rush in and offer his sympathies but Izzy says Paul doesn't want anyone to know. He's meant to be in Sydney anyway. Ned asks if they should head out again tomorrow.
IZZY: I can't leave him, Ned. He's sick.
She wants to be with him but can't put herself first anymore. However they can't let this tumour ruin three lives – Ned has to go to audition and be happy. She couldn't live with herself if she'd thought she'd stopped him from achieving his dreams. She manages to get him into the car and put his seatbelt on; then she turns the keys in the ignition.
NED: I love you, Izzy.
IZZY: Just go and don't look back.
Ned does just that, as dramatic farewell type music plays. As soon as he's out of sight the music stops and Izzy laughs hysterically to herself, jumping up and down.
Katya and Zeke arrive and Katya tells Zeke to go to his room: she needs to talk to Susan. Katya says, as Zeke eavesdrops (again), that Susan had said that she wanted Katya to be part of the family and her heart could only belong to Alex: well, she's a liar. Zeke heard what she said to Karl: she wished Katya had never come back and she and Karl are in love. Susan says the statements were taken out of context but Katya thinks the meaning is clear: Toadie had almost changed her mind about Susan but, although she might be Rachel and Zeke's guardian, she'll never be their mother. She won't stop until she's out of their lives for good!
Note: Part of the second last scene and the entire last scene were cut by Ten in error in some areas (although they were shown in full in later timezones). These scenes were tagged onto the beginning of episode 4913 in place of a recap for those who did not see them.