Summer saying she's done well in her piano exam
Steph going off her nut at Boyd
Paul tempting David to let him go down the hill
The Hill of Doom/Realisation
Paul keeps taunting David to let him go (“You're gutless. Go on, do it for Lil”), until he finally cracks and takes his hands off the handle. Rollin', rollin', rollin', Paul is really rollin' – Roll on! He looks very calm and serene as he heads towards a busy road, as does Stuntman Paul (with a completely different hair ‘do). Dave's conscience makes an appearance and he runs like Forrest after Paul – who has also had a change of heart and funnily enough doesn't want to die. He leaps out of his chair and on to the ground, eating dirt.
Erinsborough Hospital – Kayla's Room
Boyd is holding Ashley while Kayla fusses in the background. She's unsure about him calling himself ‘Daddy', “Is this you trying to talk yourself into something?” Boyd says he's just trying it out so he can get used to it, he's not going anywhere. They have a quick peck on the lips then draw apart like their mouths are allergic to one another. Boyd asks if she's found any rentals they could move into but she replies they're all too expensive. Kayla suggests the boarding house for a while but Boyd won't have a bar of that.
Hill of Realisation
David helps a screaming Paul back into his chair. He wails that he doesn't want to die then gets an odd look on his face. “You knew I'd stop myself, didn't you? Thanks…” Dave's looking like, ‘Yes… I sure did… that is correct *shifty-eyes*'. But I think he sort of did know in a roundabout way. Paul clutches David's shoulder and says he has to make things right, sincerely adding that he's sorry. David doesn't reply but starts to wheel him back to the hospital. Seems all you need for the evil fog to clear is a scary no-breaks roller-coaster ride down a hill. Groovy.
Max and Summer arrive home from Summer's exam, calling out to tell Steph the good news that Sum went well. Steph's voice can be heard from another dimension aka the Hoylands' third bedroom that was never there when Izzy was crammed into her niece's room.
Summer rips into her dad for not being as upset as Steph is but he tells her he's dealing with it as best he can. When Steph walks out (and passes Sum going the opposite direction) he sees she's holding a box full of baby things. She wants to return them to the shops before it's too late. Max reminds her Boyd's coming to see them and Steph's like, ‘Uh, your point being?' Max says it'll be a good chance to resolve a few things but Steph's afraid of what she might say if she sees him.
MAX: I know Boyd's making a mistake but I can't just turn my back on him.
STEPH: If Boyd's making a bad choice in his life then it's up to us, as his parents, to tell him. But if I'm going to blow my stack, which I'm sure I will, then it's probably best coming from you.
Paul's Hospital Room
The silent extra nurses have just helped David put Paul back in his bed. Dave tries to make a quick exit but Paul has something else he'd like to say.
PAUL: I realise an apology is pointless but I just hope that one day things might be different.
Dave just sort of gives him a grimace of a smile and steps out of the room. Harry notices his son loitering in the hallway like a sad puppy and asks what's up. David takes a seat and says that he thought he'd love to dance on Paul's grave but he doesn't feel that way at all.
DAVID: I don't feel any sense of victory or satisfaction, just…
Dave looks at his dad and nods. Harry gets the smile of, ‘My son is a lovely young Salvo man, yes he is.'
A sign on the window announces – ‘Now we are unisex!'
Connor smarms up to two women and starts his spiel. “Hi, would you two ladies be interested in our new Hawaiian range? You know if you're lucky you'll get a free lei.” The women eye roll themselves out of there as Connor holds up a lei and not an invitation to get jiggy wit it. Boom, boom tish.
Serena, meanwhile, is doing her best not to check out her customer dude who is wearing budgie smugglers while she tries to sell him some less-revealing board shorts. While he's changing, Serena storms up to Connor and asks what his problem is. He accuses her of perving but she reminds him he was the one who insisted on serving the women not the men, adding that she doesn't drool when she sees someone attractive. Connor bets she'll be heating up by the end of the day.
Steph has waited around for as long as she can bear for Boyd and starts to make a move out the door with Summer, saying in annoyance that Max can fill them in on everything. Speak of the devil and he shall appear though as Boyd makes an entrance, informing them his bus was late. Max asks everyone to sit down so they can sort some stuff out.
Boyd tells them he thinks he's figured out a way to pay for everything and still complete Year 12, as well as undertaking a part-time job. Steph doesn't think he realises the enormity of everything though, asking where they're going to live. Here's where Boyd drops a bomb – he wants to know if he, Kayla and the baby can move in for the rest of the year. Steph flips out.
STEPH: Hang on; I want to get this straight. First you take Ashley away from us and then you have the nerve to turn around and ask for a favour? What the hell did you think we'd say?
MAX: Steph lets…
STEPH: What? Did you think we'd welcome you back with open arms?
BOYD: I didn't mean to upset you, I just thought…
STEPH: No, no, Boyd. You didn't think at all. And you think you're mature enough to raise a baby, that's just a joke.
MAX: Steph, lets just calm…
STEPH: No, no, you know what? There is no way I am having you and Kayla playing happy families in my home.
Act 2, scene 8: INT/ Hoyland lounge room. Mood/ Tense. Steph/Angry. Action!
Boyd says he just wants what's best for Kayla and Ashley and that he thought everyone would like to be a part of that. Oh Boyd, you did NOT just suggest that. Max thinks they can reach a compromise but Steph is having none of that, she thinks it's time Boyd had some truth busted into him. “You think you're an adult, Boyd. Well the way you're treating us just proves you're not.”
BOYD: Fine. Then I won't stay here.
(Max stops him from going)
MAX: Hang on, mate, no one's made that decision yet.
STEPH: Actually I thought I made my thoughts pretty clear. But obviously I'm not allowed to have a say around here unless I agree with you.
Max tells Boyd to wait there while he chases after Steph but she's already one door-slam ahead of him. (Hee! Watch as Max grabs the wall near the door – it moves! Sturdy workmanship there…). He goes into the kitchen and Summer glares at her brother. “You deserve that Boyd. And way more.”
Connor looks on, laughing, while Serena has trouble serving the hunky male customers without getting flustered. Doesn't help that they're all prancing around half-nekkid in their teeny, weeny un-polka-dotted-mankinis.
She rushes to the counter to take a big drink of water while Connor mops her brow with a towel. “Aw, what's the matter, sweetie? Did you get a little bit hot under the collar there?” Serena doesn't understand what's happening, but Connor just tells her to relax. “And you call me a perve,” he teases.
Lil is cradling a sleeping Oscar while her and Lyn have a goss-fest. They chat about Sindi and how it's funny she's not staying over with Stu more since they're getting married so soon. “Who knows, maybe her stars are telling her it's not a good idea,” mocks Lil.
Lynnie rushes to answer Lil's mobile for her when it starts to ring but hesitates when she sees Paul's name on the screen. Lil says he hasn't got anybody but Lil counteracts that he's got Dylan, just as it stops ringing. She thinks it would be the worst idea in the world for Lil to see Paul after all he did to her. Lil knows Lynnie's right and tells her she won't go and see him. “Good on ya, it's for the best,” beams Lyn. Tsk, tsk, you my dear Ms Scully are too trustworthy. She's totally going to see him!
Max peers in to try and find his missing wife, finding her in the corner cradling a cup of tea. “You okay?” he asks, sitting across from her. “Yeah, I feel like a million bucks, what do you reckon?” she snaps back. Ooh, that was a 10 on the sarcasm meter, high five for you young lady. She tells him she meant every word she said before and she's not apologising. Max says he can't turn his back on his son and this way he'll at least know he's safe. Steph reminds him that Ashley was supposed to be her daughter, “my best chance at becoming a mum”, and she can't just sit back and pretend everything's fine.
MAX: Boyd and Summer are your children too.
STEPH: (tries not to implode) Oh God. You just don't understand, you've never understood, have you?
MAX: That is not fair, Steph.
STEPH: And what Boyd's doing is?
MAX: No. Look you're just going to have to forget about your pain and be a mum.
STEPH: Well I can't just forget about everything, right. (Stands up) If you want to wrap Boyd up in cotton wool you go ahead and do it, but that's not the way I want to live my life.
Steph runs out leaving Max to stew.
Lynnie hears a rap at the door and wonders aloud to Oscar who it could be. Okay, bets on everyone. The Easter Bunny? Sponge Bob Square Pants? Marlene back from her cruise at the wrong house? Or perhaps a daughter by the name of Steph?
(Lyn opens the door)
LYN: Hey, love.
STEPH: (on the verge of tears) Hey, mum. Would it be alright if I moved back home?
Lynnie envelops her in a hug and asks her what's going on.
Paul's Hospital Room
Lil saunters up to the door and opens it, surprising Paul a little. He says for her not to worry, he's not going to yell at her again. She takes a seat next to his bed and comments that he looks happier (he has a magazine on the bed – hope it's just the business one…). He replies that he had a bit of a wake up call.
PAUL: I just want to apologise for the way I've been treating you. I acted appallingly. Yeah sure, I could waste my breath telling you how much I've changed because of what's happened and how sorry I am, but the truth is I just want the chance to love you again, and to be loved back by you. (He puts his hand on hers) Take me back.
Paul's Hospital Room
Lil says she's happy he's had a turn around but they can't go back to what they had, as she places his hand back by his side. Paul says he loves her and he knows that she's not happy with David (I wouldn't be too sure there, bucko).
PAUL: Let me prove to you how I see things so differently now. Give me that chance, please?
LIL: We had our chance, Paul.
PAUL: Yeah, and I blew it.
LIL: (looks a little teary) I have to go. (Kisses him on the forehead)
(She starts to walk away but he calls out to her)
PAUL: Lil… One day. One day…
What? My prince will come? Oh, you're being all knowledgeable and whimsical and I just ruined the moment… gotcha. Lil just smiles and walks out. Paul tries to keep his tears at bay and not cry. I'm sorry but, aww.
Steph has just finished telling Lynnie what happened while Lynnie gives her daughter a cuddle on the couch. She says that the best thing for Steph to do would be to talk it out with Max so he can listen to her concerns. Steph says that Boyd has really, really hurt her this time and Max won't do anything about it. Lyn tells her she's not being unreasonable and that her and Max will be able to work things out.
STEPH: I wish I knew how.
LYN: Well the first thing, you've got to take a step back I reckon. I mean this isn't the time for decisions is it? Not after everything you've just been through.
Lyn says Steph's welcome to stay there if she wants but she probably knows what would be the better thing to do. “Love, you've just lost a baby. You don't want to lose a husband too.” Don't worry Lynnie; they do this all the time. This is like almost break-up #474837391.
Boyd makes Kayla as comfy as he can on the couch with pillows while Summer floats around on the phone snitching about how crowded it is. Max tells her to lay off it and hang up because dinner's ready.
SUMMER: (into phone) I've got to go the fun police have spoken.
Kayla says to Max that she appreciates him having them there and that he's taught Boyd really well how to care about people. Sum asks if they're waiting for Steph but Max isn't really counting on her making an appearance – he should know by now what happens when you utter something like that. Yep, Steph walks through the door. Max gives her a kiss and Steph says hi to Kayla. “Welcome,” she adds, in a tone of voice that is so glum, Eeyore is like, “Lady, you're taking over my job.”
Serena and Lil pour over some magazines, laughing about the fashion choices some people have made, while Dave looks on from the counter. “Just like the old days, eh?” says Harry. “Almost,” Dave smiles.
Connor walks in to a cheery greeting from David. He's very impressed with the Irish lad for giving Serena a job and comments on how much it's brightened her up. He adds that he's a good man and they appreciate him helping Serena out. Lil walks over to them to second that motion. Connor gets all guilty because of how annoying he's been to Serena and orders his coffee, making a hasty retreat from the adoring Bishops.
Dave asks Lil if she's having a good day and she looks a little undecided. “Ah well let's just say in retrospect I'll remember it as a very good day.”
Connor clicks in Serena's face till she pays attention to him, but he claims he comes in peace. He lets her in on the bikini shop secret and gets her to imagine someone really “pathetically unsexy” in a leopard-print string bikini. Serena gets a funny grin on her face.
CONNOR: Hey, are you by any chance picturing Toadie? Cause that works for me every time.
SERENA: (trying not to crack up) No, it's um, no one you know!
Hands up who thought we'd get a two-piece-leopard-print-string-bikini-Connor shot there? *raises hand*
Ashley is crying her little head off and Boyd and Kayla aren't quite sure what's wrong. She's been fed and changed so they're confused. Steph suggests that she might be hot and to loosen the blanket but Boyd replies the nurse said Ashley would be fine like that. Steph wrestles with her inner-conflict some more before eventually offering to hold Ashley and try and settle her. Kayla gently says she'll stop soon though.
In the meantime, through this awkward situation, Summer has been on the phone to the exam board. She got into the music school, yay! Everyone's pleased and she tells them she'll have to leave asap.
SUMMER: I can't wait to get out of here.
SUMMER: No it's true, okay, everyone's lying to each other saying this whole situation is fine when we know it's not.
BOYD: Yeah good one you idiot, make Kayla feel really welcome now.
SUMMER: Don't blame me, okay. You're the one that started this whole problem.
Everyone looks uncomfortable as all heck.