Matt riding Mike's bike down Ramsay Street.
Sharon tries to tell Mike that they were just mucking around, but Mike retorts that Matt has just stolen his bike: he really doesn't think the police are going to find it very funny. Sharon exclaims:
SHARON: You're not going to go to the *police*?!
MIKE (demands): Well, why *shouldn't* I?
NICK: Because it was *your fault*. If you hadn't had a go at him about being stupid, he never would've done it.
SHARON: You should know how touchy he is about his dyslexia.
MIKE: I wasn't referring to *that*.
SHARON: Well, what did you expect him to think when you called him an idiot?
MIKE: Because he was *acting* like one. [Mutters] He's not going to get away with this...
Gail and Paul have turned up at No. 30 and Paul is explaining to Hilary that they thought they'd come over and remind her about the company meeting this afternoon. Hilary, however, insists that there was no need to do that: she knows what is required of a company Director and she shall be there ready to do her duty. Paul tells her that they're going to keep the meeting informal and have it over lunch at the Waterhole. Hilary exclaims that she thought a company Directors' meeting should be confidential, but Gail tells her that they've only got a few things to discuss; they might as well do it in a relaxed atmosphere.
HILARY (witheringly): I thought you two took business *seriously*.
Paul and Gail reply in unison that they do - but they just thought they'd like to take her to lunch. Hilary sighs that she supposes it'll be all right - although somewhere a little more upmarket than the Waterhole--. She breaks off as someone starts thumping on the front door. She goes and opens it and Mike marches in, snapping at Hilary that he wants a word with her. Paul asks Hilary if 1pm's all right and he and Gail head out. Hilary then joins Mike and says she gathers something's wrong.
MIKE (tersely): Matt has stolen my motorbike.
HILARY (looking astonished): Oh, I can't believe it. He couldn't have.
MIKE: Well he *has* - and I want something *done* about it.
Henry is practising his patter for selling the Marvel Sponge Absorber in front of Bronwyn. When he's finished, she applauds. Henry asks if she thinks his spiel is better than the old one. Bronwyn smiles that his is much less boring than the one they gave him.
HENRY (frowns): Less 'boring'?
BRONWYN (quickly): No - what I mean is yours isn't boring at all; you'll sell *lots* of sponges with it!
Henry comments that *Madge* didn't seem real impressed: she thinks he should stick with the original spiel. Bronwyn tells him that Madge has a few things on her mind. Henry comments that Harold has had a few things on his mind, too. Hearing Harold's name, Bronwyn realises that she's going to be late for work and she heads off, leaving Henry practising his patter again!
Des emerges from the kitchen and tells Jane - who's sitting at the counter - that her raisin toast won't be long. They start kissing, just as Paul and Gail come in, and Gail grins:
GAIL: Goodness me, what's the Coffee Shop coming to?!
Des turns and asks what he can get them. Paul asks Des if he's working there today and Des explains that he came to see Harold but he's snowed under, so he gave him a hand; as soon as Bronny gets there, he's off to the travel agent. Paul asks who won the battle for the honeymoon and Des tells him:
DES: I did. Jane saw the error of her ways! It was pretty easy... just sort of like putty in my hands!
Jane suggests to Gail that they head back to the office and get away from the chauvinists!
Hilary is talking on the 'phone, saying to Mike that Matt hasn't turned up yet but she's sure he can't be far. She sounds worried and upset. She hangs up just as the front door opens and Matt comes in. Hilary sighs in relief, but then asks Matt what on Earth he was thinking of. She asks if the bike's all right, and Matt points out that of *course* it is: he *can ride*! Hilary retorts that he's hardly experienced; what was he thinking of?
MATT: Well, he hassled me. I mean, I got angry, you know?
HILARY (tersely): So you stole his bike. That makes *great* sense, doesn't it? If Mike had reported you to the police, you could've been arrested like some common criminal.
MATT: I did *not* steal the bike. I borrowed it; I took it for a ride, that's all.
HILARY: You deliberately stole someone else's property. Now, that behaviour is totally unacceptable. Well, young man, you're grounded - indefinitely.
MATT: Bad luck, Hilary - I'm not buying that.
HILARY (looking astonished): What do you mean?
MATT: OK, I took Mike's bike in the heat of the moment. Maybe it was wrong, but I'm *sick* of him hassling me and I'm sick of *you* doing it as well.
HILARY (warns): Don't you take that tone with *me*. Can't you see that you're in the wrong? It was a stupid thing to do.
MATT: 'Stupid'. 'Stupid'. Do you know, that's all I get these days? You're as bad as *he* is.
Matt goes to storm out. Hilary stops him and says more calmly that she didn't mean *he* was stupid, but what he *did* was. She then asks him to be man enough to admit that he's wrong and take the punishment. Matt, however, retorts:
MATT: No. No - there was too long when you didn't give a damn about me. You weren't my mother for all those years, so don't think you can start telling me what to do now, because I'm not going to cop it.
With that, Matt storms out. Hilary sits down, looking worried.
Des is serving up food in the kitchen. Jane comes in and asks him what he's still doing there. Des explains that Harold had to go and see some suppliers and he couldn't leave Bronny there by herself. He hesitates before then saying to Jane that he thought she might have been mad at him about the honeymoon: he doesn't care *where* they go, as long as it's with her. Jane tells him:
JANE: I feel exactly the same way - and to be honest, I've come around about the idea of going to Bali.
Des sighs that he's been forcing things on her - like he knew she wasn't keen about that double wedding. Jane, however, tells him that she's been thinking about that too and it's fine:
JANE: I'm sure every girl wants to be the centre of attention on her wedding day, but I don't mind sharing it with Kerry - as long as she doesn't look better than *I* do!
DES (warmly): No one *could*.
They kiss. Jane then suggests that they should start thinking about a venue for the wedding too; she'd really like a fairly traditional wedding, but she's not sure how Kerry would feel about it. Des suggests that they should organise a summit meeting.
Hilary is sitting at a table in the Waterhole with Paul and Gail, commenting witheringly that La Restaurant would have been much more suitable. Paul remarks that that's a bit expensive for lunch, and Hilary asks if he's saying the company's doing so badly they can't afford it. Paul, however, tells her:
PAUL: No. On the contrary we're in very *good* financial shape. In fact, that's what we want to talk to you about.
HILARY: But you haven't declared this meeting open or read the minutes of the previous one.
PAUL (sighs): All right, I declare this meeting open, OK?
GAIL: And we can take the minutes as read.
PAUL: Why what?
HILARY: Why should we take them as read? They *haven't* been.
Paul points out to Hilary that she received typed copies of the notes of the last meeting: didn't she read them? Hilary retorts that of course she did, but she can't be expected to remember all the finer details. Paul tells here there *weren't* any: it was supposed to be an informal meeting. Hilary gives in and asks who's taking the minutes of *this* meeting. Gail says quickly that *she* is. Hilary comments that it doesn't seem right or proper for one of the Directors to take the minutes. Paul sighs and asks if they can just keep this simple: he's got some news which he thinks will interest her:
PAUL: We had a very, very good financial year—
GAIL: Occupancy rates are up 30%.
PAUL: --and we happen to have sold a parcel of land at Elliott Park.
HILARY: I hope you got a good price for it?
PAUL: Yeah, an excellent one - and we thought we'd use that money to buy out your share of the company.
Hilary looks taken aback. She exclaims:
HILARY: I beg your pardon?
PAUL: Well, I mean, we're very grateful that you helped us out when you did, but now that we're in a position to—
HILARY: Oh, and this is your way of showing gratitude is it? Just to push me out.
GAIL: Hilary, we're not doing that. We thought you bought in for a period of time and now we think you'd probably like to have your money back.
HILARY (curtly): If the company is making a profit, I can't see why you think I'd want to sell out. When you're in trouble it seems you can't do without me - or my money, I should say - but now you're having a little success you want to simply cast me aside like an old boot.
PAUL: Hilary, we simply made the offer because we thought it was what you'd *want*.
HILARY: What I *want*, Paul, is to remain part of the company, and I have no intention of selling out. Now, please make sure that *that* is recorded in the minutes.
Gail and Paul both sit there looking weary!
Henry is delivering his new spiel for the Marvel Sponge Absorber. A group of kids have gathered round him. Henry throws various substances at a piece of carpet, making it filthy. He then starts to demonstrate the sponge absorber - but the stain doesn't budge. One of the kids watching says she doesn't reckon the Absorber's any good. Henry tells her quickly that of *course* it is - and he offers her a drink on the house to keep her quiet; but as he hands over a bottle of soft drink, Henry's boss approaches and demands to know what he thinks he's doing. Henry stares at him. The boss asks him tersely how many Marvel Sponge Absorbers he's sold. Henry admits:
HENRY: None - yet - but look at the size of the crowd I've attracted!
The boss says sarcastically that he doesn't imagine they're going to want to spend their *pocket money* on the product. He goes on that it's pretty obvious to him that Henry doesn't take his work seriously - so he's fired. Henry's face drops.
Des is sitting at the table, working, when Mike comes in. Des remarks that he didn't think he'd be home for lunch, but Mike explains that he wanted to check his bike for damages. Des replies that he already has, and it's OK.
MIKE: Oh - so you know what happened, then?
DES: Sharon and Nick filled me in, yeah.
MIKE (coolly): Oh, I can imagine what *their* version of the story was like.
Des comments that it was a bit rough on Matt, calling him an idiot: he can't help it if he's got dyslexia. Mike retorts that he wasn't having a go at him about *that*. Des tells Mike that he's been coming down on those kids really hard for a while, now.
MIKE: Yeah, because it's really difficult for me. I live in the same street as them, I knew them before I was a teacher... I just don't get any *respect* from them.
DES: Look, you only get respect when you *earn* it, mate.
MIKE: I haven't done anything *wrong*. Why are you getting stuck into *me* over this. Look, if Matt misinterpreted what I said, then that's *his* fault. He still had no right to take the bike.
DES (sighs): Yeah... yeah. You're right. All I'm saying is that, as a teacher, you've got to *encourage* kids, eh? Bring out the best in them.
Matt is looking through some records in the lounge room at No. 30 when Hilary comes in and remarks that she didn't know he was home. She offers him some scones for afternoon tea, but he declines. He then tells Hilary that he shouldn't have yelled at her this morning; he was angry and he's sorry. Hilary starts to say that that's hardly an excuse, but is interrupted by a knock on the front door. She goes and opens it and finds Mike standing on the step. She tells him that if he's come to find out about Matthew's punishment, she's already *dealing* with the matter. Mike, however, says:
MIKE: I'd like to handle it myself, if that's all right with you.
HILARY (warns): I don't want you harassing him in his own home.
MIKE: I'm *not* going to harass him; I just want to talk.
Hilary invites Mike in and says she'll be in the kitchen. She adds that she trusts that they'll both remain civil. She leaves Mike and Matt to it. Matt says to Mike:
MATT: I shouldn't've taken your bike. I'm sorry - I did the wrong thing and it won't happen again, OK?
MIKE (nods): OK.
MATT (looking surprised): What? That's it?
MIKE: No... No, it seems I owe you an apology.
MIKE: Well, those remarks I made about you being an idiot: you obviously took them as some reference to your dyslexia.
MATT: Well of course I did: what *else* would you have meant?
MIKE: Believe it or not, that's not what I was talking about. I meant you were acting like an idiot mucking around on my bike - nothing else; but I guess, as a teacher, I should've known better than to say something like that.
Mike then goes on that he thinks he's been a little bit heavy on Nick and Sharon as well. Matt nods that they do think so. Mike says he's sorry and he'll try and ease up. Matt suggests they all give each other a fair go.
Sharon is talking to Bronwyn in the kitchen about the engagement ring that Henry bought, and Bronwyn smiles that he can be so romantic when he wants to be! Sharon asks if they've set a date yet. Bronwyn says they haven't.
SHARON: I don't suppose you've thought about who's going to be bridesmaids and all that, then...?
BRONWYN: I don't *have* to think much, do I? *You'll* be my bridesmaid!
The two of them go and sit down in the lounge room and Sharon tells Bronwyn that they've grown apart a bit lately, as Bronwyn's been so busy with Henry. Bronwyn assures her that she didn't *mean* to leave her out. The front door opens suddenly and Henry walks in slowly. Bronwyn smiles at him that they've just made it official: Sharon's going to be her bridesmaid.
HENRY: Oh, really? Well, she'll probably get to be *grandmother* before she gets to be bridesmaid.
He goes on that it wouldn't be right to get married until he can hold down a decent job, and he doesn't know if he'll ever be able to do *that*. Bronwyn asks if he got fired. Henry nods that he did. Bronwyn insists that there are other jobs, but Henry sighs:
HENRY: Not for *me*: I always seem to blow it.
Sharon exclaims that she can't believe this is the unstoppable Henry Ramsay talking: what happened to the coolest dude in Erinsborough?! Bronwyn tells Henry that he always bounces back! Sharon adds that Henry should bounce right down to the CES office and see what else they have to offer him! Henry listens and then exclaims that she's right! He runs to the door, leaving Sharon to remark to Bronwyn that being married to Henry is going to be very exhausting!
Des sits down at the table with Gail and Paul and remarks that they're stuck with Hilary.
PAUL (grimly): Maybe *forever*, by the looks of it.
Paul then goes on that they should use the money from the land to build up the business a bit. Gail asks if they shouldn't put it towards the loan repayments, but Paul insists that you should use your capital advantageously. Gail murmurs that paying off some of that huge loan would be advantageous... The front door opens suddenly and Jane comes in. She tells Des that she's been talking to Kerry and Joe about a place to have the wedding, and they've already come up with an idea and she thinks it's great.
DES: Where is it?
JANE: The butterfly enclosure at the zoo.
DES (exclaims): You want to get married at the *zoo*?!
Gail smiles that the butterfly enclosure's terrific! Des remarks:
DES: Trust Kerry to think of something like that!
JANE: Come on, Des, it'll be fantastic; I mean, really romantic.
Gail points out to Des that *he* got Bali, so the least he can do is let Jane have butterflies. Des pulls Jane onto his lap and beams:
DES: If you're going to marry me, I don't care *where* it is!
Bronwyn and Sharon are still talking, Bronwyn saying that Aunt Edie wasn't too pleased. Sharon remarks that she never *was* too keen on Henry. The front door opens suddenly and Henry bursts in, looking happy. He announces:
HENRY: The conquering hero doth returneth!
BRONWYN: You got a job?
HENRY: Did I ever!
BRONWYN: That was quick! Is it another selling job?
HENRY: Yes - and the commission's a lot better than it was for the Marvel Sponge Absorber.
Henry goes on that this thing *has* to be easier to sell: it's something everyone in the world has to have.
BRONWYN: Well come on - what is it? What are you selling?
BRONWYN and SHARON: What?!
HENRY (seriously): Pre-packaged, made-to-measure funerals. Like I said: sooner or later, *everyone* has to have one.
As a grin crosses Henry's face again, Bronwyn and Sharon sit there not knowing how to react!