Carmella turns down her friends money for the operation
Lou telling Mishka they'll prove to immigration they've known each other for twenty years
Katya telling Guy he'll have his money at the end of the week, whilst looking at her gun
Carmella telling Rosetta that she and Will deserve each other
Number 24 where we learn that Susan won't lie but Will Help
Mishka tells Lou that he was very good looking twenty years ago. Well, in the shoot they did about two days ago, anyway. They are determined to get Mishka her visa, and there's a knock at the door – it's ImmigrationSuse™, here to test the two love birds on their knowledge of each other. She states for the record she doesn't condone lying to a government department, but wants to help two people she knows are in love.
MISHKA: You have ze questions?
SUSAN: Yes. Freshly downloaded from the internet.
So. An easy test to pass, then – just look ‘em up and practice ze answers.
Susan wants to know who she should interview first, but Mishka says they are both first – they're in love!
SUSAN: Immigration department interviews with de facto couples are done individually to avoid visa fraud. So who's first?
Wow – she sounded like a real immigration person, then, as well as speaking like CJ from The West Wing.
The Scarlet Bar where Paul knows Something We Don't
Steph asks Rosetta for some legal advice – she's having problems with the bar because everything is in Max's name. Rosetta tells Steph she's flat out – but she could try Toadie? Steph isn't keen; she doesn't want to take advantage (yeah, whatever) so Rosetta gives in.
Will comes over and asks Rosetta if Carmella really thinks he's only interested in her looks, but Rosie assures him she's just lashing out, and that she's not taking the injury well. Will wants to know if it's true, if Rosie does like him, as Carmella implied. Rosie denies it strenuously. A little *too* strenuously. She makes her excuses and leaves.
Paul is at another table asking for Steph's blessing on his and Lyn's engagement. But he notices Will at the bar, and recognises him. He had no idea he'd moved onto the street (does he never get out?) but knows him from his past, somewhere… Steph gives her blessing to Paul (she hated him a few weeks ago…?), and beams at him before leaving. What is it with Steph suddenly loving Paul? Suddenly not loving Max and falling for Toadie?? How are we supposed to believe in characters who change their emotions on a whim??
Number 30 where Pepper tries the Look Of Love
Pepper and Fraser are chatting in the kitchen. Fraser tries to remind Pepper that he and her don't actually have a relationship. He notices lots of presents on the side which are engagement presents that the neighbours have been dropping off for them. Pepper thinks it's cute, but Fraser doesn't want to know. Zeke turns up to clean, but Pepper dismisses him very quickly, before going back to the kitchen in a new outfit to woo her ‘fiancé'.
Rachel and Bree are chatting at the table about Loris and how she was strange with Bree the other day. Bree announces that she's no longer TrinityBree™, just plain old Bree Timmins again.
RACH: Pity. I was just starting to get used to weirdo Trinity.
BREE: I'm weird? When I first met you, you wore your pants, like, up here, and you thought the OC was a vitamin.
RACH: What?! Ach, no I didn't!
Zeke comes home and asks Bree to go to the museum with him – he wants to share it with her. Bree agrees and leaves with Zeke, just as Katya and Ned close the d…
Sorry, I got bored.
Rachel shows Katya her new top, and tells her that Guy bought it for her – he had just won some money. Kat is livid with her – and reminds her to never to accept any money from him.
Number 30 where it's So Over
Pepper is going on and on to Will how their relationship is like a movie; they move in together under false pretences, then bit by bit really fall in love. And their fake engagement becomes a real engagement… Fraser calls time on it. He's fed up, now. It's over, for real.
And yet, I thought they had literally just slept together?? Charming.
He tells her he doesn't love her, and that all her relationships end up this way because she has a killer father for a role model! Pepper dumps him back in retaliation.
Number 24 where we learn that Mishka and Lou Know Nothing
Susan is conducting the immigration interviews, flicking between Mishka and Lou. Lou remembers their first kiss, the lagoon and the coconuts; Susan gazes at the picture of them. Then she wants to know where they keep their underwear, because that's what immigration will ask. Can they draw a map of the bedroom? Who is each other's best friend? Do they have children?
Susie adds up the results. They failed. They actually missed by a mile.
Mishka had said their first kiss was Tahiti – it was Fiji.
Olga isn't Mishka's best friend – that's her husband's mistress.
Lou has a daughter called Lolly, not a son called Larry – but it's not Mishka's fault because she's never met him.
Mishka can't draw maps.
Lou said that Mishka keeps vodka with her knickers.
So. Not going well, then. Susan tells them she's leaving, and is rather miffed when they don't even see her leave...!
Susan arrives home to find Rachel studying. Rach asks if Karl will be sued by Janelle, and Susan admits she's threatened it, yes. Susan apologises to her about the way things ended with Scott, but Rachel understands she was too young to be in an adult relationship. Bree and Zeke arrive home debating poetry letters at the museum; Susan and Rachel smile at them, pleased to see them getting along again, and back together. Aw.
The Law Firm where Rosetta Plays It Safe
Paul arrives to speak to Rosetta, and introduces himself to say thanks for all the work she did on Lassiters whilst he was away. He asks after the new guys at number 30 – what's the name of the new guy at the bar? Oh yeah – Will. He's clearly trying to get information, with no success. Steph arrives as Paul walks out, and Rosetta tells her that she'll have to see Toadie about her legal issues. Steph goes into Toadie's office.
Number 24 where Will is Sweet
Will is knocking at the door to speak to Carmella. He tells her he likes her a lot, and will support her decision about the operation, whatever it is. He suggests they go get a drink, and Carmy suggests they stay at home, so he reminds her she's beautiful and drags her out regardless.
Katya is packing a bag of cash in the kitchen, and calls Guy to tell him she has his money. She grabs her gun before she leaves. What a pro.
The Law Firm where Toadie is So In Love
Toadie is sorting out getting Steph's name on the mortgage and other stuff at The Scarlet Bar. Charlie – dressed in real clothes – is asleep on Steph, and Toadie smiles affectionately at him. Steph stares back at Toadie and says she has to leave.
Toadie has a jar of biscuits up on his shelf and I want one.
Number 30 where Pepper is Annoying
Pepper sobs into her tissue at Rosetta and explains what has happened with Fraser – and thinks maybe she should become a nun. Rosetta assures her she needn't do that, whilst Pepper bemoans that she might never find anyone. Hey – someone should really tell these people that sometimes you can be quite happy alone. I guess that's not a message that's gotten through to Erinsborough, yet.
The Scarlet Bar where it's all Too OTT
Carmella and Will come into the bar. The extras stare at her, even though they couldn't actually see her face as she came in. Will orders champagne from Steph, and nods at Paul who stands next to him. Paul quickly picks up his mobile, and asks for Sebastian, at which Will stares nervously at Paul before he walks away, and Will is left at the bar looking rather terrified.
Susan is at a table with Rach, Zeke and Bree, who are all staring at Carmella, and Susan begs them to look away. The extras all stare at Carmella, too, even though they can't see her face. Seriously – are people so narrow minded in Erinsborough that they would continue to stare at something as simple as a scar for more than three minutes?? Have they never seen one before??! It's all a little OTT if you ask me. Carmella stands up and declares that everyone should get back to minding their own business.
Number 24 where there is Excellent Carpenter Continuity
Lou is reminding Mishka of his four children again. EXCELLENT continuity! They even remember Mai Ling! Mishka is confused because Lolly isn't Lou's real child, but Lou keeps reassuring her – they will remember these things. They really will! Carmella returns home with Will and Mishka sensibly takes Lou out to give them some time alone.
Will goes to kiss Carmella before he leaves, but she turns away. He reminds her that he will stand by her, and tells her that she shouldn't deny herself the operation just to punish herself, or because she might feel responsible for what happened. She has to have or not have the operation for the right reasons.
Plus, it would make it *so* much easier for the make up department if she went ahead.
A Muddy Track near some Trees by a Lake in Australia
Guy drives up in his little white car, and approaches Katya in her car. She tells him the cops are onto them, and she's hidden the money in the bush; he drags her out the car and tells her to lead the way.
Number 30 where I want Sindi Back
Will returns home to find Ned, Rosetta, Pepper and Will round the table. Pepper has an announcement to make. The engagement is off (she's not explaining why), and Fraser has agreed to move out. Which is news to him. He wants her to move out as she dumped him, and declares they should vote for it. Will votes for Fraser, and Rosetta for Pepper. Which leaves Ned. Ned, who is completely unable to make any sort of decision whatsoever, and in making no decisions, makes no face movement or emotional reaction either.
Ned says he doesn't know, so Pepper tells him the whole story of their relationship being a scam – she wasn't strong enough to tell the truth, and Fraser was so forceful with her…
Oh, please cut the dramatics. Sindi Watts number two?? Not even close, my dear. Not even close.
The Bush where the Tension is Killed
Katya and Guy are in the bush, and Katya gives him directions to the money. As he collects it, she pulls her gun out with two hands. Come on, Katya. Everyone knows you should only hold a gun with one hand. You're *so* unprofessional. Guy taunts her, then lunges for her, and the gun goes off? Who is shot? We don't know, we'll have to wait for the next exciting instalment…
Although actually we don't. Because the preview immediately tells us that Katya's been left for dead, so that kinda killed the tension.
Why, why, why is Ned never in scenes like this?