- Amy takes photographs of Lance and Drew shirtless, but tells Lance he's a little pale for the shots.
- Lance uses a whole bottle of fake tan and ends up completely orange.
- Philip tells Harold that Holly ingested a poison used in snail bait.
- Harold tells Hannah about the snail bait. Hannah accuses Harold of killing Holly.
The Coffee Shop
Hannah and Paul tell Toadie and Nick about the dead pets.
TOADIE: It looks like we've got a serial pet killer loose in Erinsborough.
Toadie tells Nick he should broadcast this news on his radio show. He thinks he should do an investigation piece to find out who the killer is. Hannah says they know who the killer is, Harold. Nick and Toadie are surprised. Hannah explains about the snail pellets that Harold lay down, and Toadie thinks it was just a terrible accident.
HANNAH: What if it wasn't? Harold is always going on about what a nuisance pets are.
TOADIE: He's always going on about what a nuisance I am, he hasn't tried to slip me a snail pellet.
Nick thinks Harold will be feeling bad enough as it is without being accused on public radio of being a pet killer. Paul guesses Toadie is right. Toadie knows he is, but he still doesn't have a scoop for his radio show.
Ben tries to distract Amy who is desperate to go through and see Lance. Ben lies that Lance is sleeping because he's sick.
BEN (struggling to keep a straight face): The truth is you can't see Lance because he's feeling a little off- colour.
Amy barges past just as Lance leaves his room, wearing lots of clothes, a balaclava covering his whole face and sunglasses.
LANCE: I thought it would be a good look.
AMY: For what, robbing banks? Exploring Antartica?
Amy chases Lance around the room before pulling off the balaclava and is shocked to see his face is bright orange. She bursts out laughing.
Hannah and Paul apologise to Harold for accusing them of killing their pets. Harold says they don't need to apologise, he knows Hannah had just lost a pet and was grieving and no one is rational at a time like that. He assures them that he would never do something like that on purpose and they believe him. Harold calls them very generous for apologising at a time like this and he appreciates it. He apologises again for what happened and he assures them he will be using animal safe products in his garden from now on. Harold gives Paul a bag of seamonkeys, which need fed like a real pet. Harold tells him they can be a pet for Paul.
Amy is trying to take some photos of Lance, but he's trying to hide from the camera and tells Amy to go.
LANCE: You're treating me like some kind of freak. Hey everybody, come meet Carrot- boy!
AMY: All I want to do is take photos of your body against Drew's. Compare the amazing contrast.
LANCE: Thanks very much!
AMY: I'm talking about skin tone, orange against brown.
LANCE: Yeah, the jaffa effect! Forget it.
Lance says there's no way he's leaving the house like this, let alone posing for photos. He looks like an idiot.
AMY: Don't you see how totally cool your skin would look in the photos? It's… it's…
AMY: Well it's positively glowing!
Lance is going to get some steel wool or bleach to get this off his face. Ben rushes in and tells Lance that he's calling the vet. Bonnie has been sick in the kitchen, and he thinks it's serious.
Nick suggests Toadie do a story about snail pellets anyway and how they can be dangerous to pets. Toadie wants to entertain people, not bore them to death. What he needs is a big story, a big name, a big star. As they discuss them a man enters the pub and sits at the bar. Toadie identifies him as Dave Graney and explains to Nick that Dave Graney is a mega popstar! Apparently Toadie's eldest brother was into Dave's first band, the Moodists, while he was in the detention centre and Toadie's grown up with him. Nick suggests Toadie ask him for an interview. Toadie couldn't, Dave Graney is a living legend, he can't just walk up to him. Toadie walks up to Dave and introduces himself and asks him for a huge favour. Dave nods along.
Harold, Paul and Hannah enter the house. Harold tells Phil that if he decides to get another dog then he'd be happy to pay for it. Phil says they'll remain a pet free house for a while. He offers Hannah some seamonkeys, but she says she'll be okay. Harold says Phil should be proud of Hannah and the way she's handling this.
PHIL: That's my daughter Harold. Mature, insightful, kind, caring, compassionate…
HANNAH (embarrassed): Okay dad
PHIL: …beautiful, intelligent…
PAUL: Don't go overboard, it's just Hannah.
Phil is glad they sorted this out, and it'll be sad not having Holly around. Phil says it could have been worse, if Louise had found those pellets, but Harold assures them that couldn't happen. Amy arrives and tells Harold that Lance is at the vets and they need to know the name of the poison that killed Holly. Bonnie's at the vet and might have eaten some as well.
Dave tells Toadie no. Toadie thinks his audience would boost Dave's sales, but Dave thinks he could sell way more by doing 10 minutes at the local record shop. Toadie and Nick ask Dave to think about it and he says he will. After a few seconds, he says no. Toadie says he's been a fan of his since he was a kid and he just wants half an hour with him. Dave says half an hour is a long time. He wishes Toadie luck with the show and leaves.
Ben, Amy and Lance return home. They tell Ruth, Phil, Hannah and Harold that Bonnie is alive and is being kept at the vets overnight for observation. Ruth is relieved, but stops when she sees Lance who is sort of hiding behind Ben. Ben moves out the way so everyone can see Lance. Hannah and Phil start laughing, while Ruth wonders what Lance did. Lance explains he got carried away with the fake tan. Lance gets touchy about it and leaves, while Amy follows. Ruth doesn't know if she should laugh or be concerned. Phil and Hannah burst out laughing again.
Toadie tells Nick he's dead, he's been calling agents to find a celebrity who he could interview. One of the Wiggles said yes, Dorothy the dinosaur! Nick starts laughing. Toadie says if he doesn't find someone soon, then Tony will be on his back hassling him. Nick thinks Toadie might be in luck, and points Toadie towards the table Dave Graney was sitting at. Dave's left his mobile phone there, and when Dave calls to find out where his phone is, Toadie will be the one who answers. Toadie says he'll tell Dave if he ever wants to see his phone again, he'll have to agree to an interview. One of the bar staff is about to clear the table, when Toadie rushes over and says the phone is his. He takes it and laughs triumphantly.
Ben tells Lance it is safe to come out, everyone's gone. Ben says he's going to head out, go to the park, get some fresh air and a bit of a tan! Lance groans at Ben's joke as Ben leaves.
AMY: Come on Lance, don't you think you're making a bit much of it.
LANCE: You're not the one who looks like an overcooked ginger nut!
Amy doesn't think it's a big deal, and he's probably not the only person to have bright orange skin before. It's not permanent damage, it will wear off. Lance wants it off now, why can't they make instant tan remover? Amy says it will be gone in a couple of days, and in the meantime they should make the most of it. Amy wants to photograph him.
AMY: It looks so earthy and exotic and…
LANCE: Stupid is I think the word you're looking for.
Amy says it will look fantastic on film, and she actually thinks it's a turn- on. She says it's out of the ordinary, it's wild.
Kev, the barman, tells Dave that no one has handed anything in. He offers to post a notice on the message board. Dave says it's okay and then goes to the phone to call his mobile.
Number 30/Lou's Place
Toadie answers Dave Graney's phone. Dave asks for an address to pick up the phone. Toadie says if he wants his phone, he'll need to meet their demands. He should go to Uni FM at midday. Dave realises who is holding his phone to ransom. Toadie says he has a call waiting and puts him on hold for a second. He tells Nick he's got him! Toadie goes back on the line with Dave and tells him he was on the phone with Dave's agent and he's told her he's busy all afternoon.
TOADIE: Midday at the Uni Mr Graney. Or we start deleting all the numbers in your stored memory!
Dave hangs up, while Toadie rejoices.
Lance gets off the phone with Ben, having checked that it's only him and Drew at the garage so no one else will see them. Amy says they don't need to go to the garage anymore. She's changed her mind, she only needs him, and for the shots she wants the garage might be too public. Amy wants to contrast the tanned skin with the parts that Lance didn't tan. She wants Lance naked.
The Coffee Shop
Toadie is calling people to inform them about his interview with Dave Graney. He's going to call a few journalists to get some publicity for his show. This is a major coup and could do wonders for Toadie's career. Nick says Dave hasn't agreed to give him an interview, he's only coming down to the station to get back his phone which Toadie stole from him. Toadie says if he hadn't found Dave's phone it would probably still be lost, the guy owes him one so he'll get his interview. Nick thinks the guy probably wants to kill him, so getting him in a booth in front of a microphone won't be easy.
Lance is wearing only his boxer shorts as Amy takes photographs, but he refuses to take the boxers off. Amy asks him to go by the window so he can get some natural light, but as Lance opens the curtains he sees Harold coming up the path.
LANCE: You hide, I'll answer the door! No… you answer the door, get rid of him, say no one's home, say anything, get rid of him.
Lance for some reason hides around the corner in the living room. Amy answers the door and Harold walks in, walking into the hall so that Lance is now standing behind him. Harold explains he was feeling guilty about Bonnie so he's bought her a new dog collar. Lance meanwhile backs away and hides behind the curtain. Amy thanks Harold for the gift and sends him out. Amy bursts out laughing.
Toadie asks Nick if he knows what to do. Nick says it probably has a name, like kidnapping or false imprisonment. Toadie needs to know he can rely on Nick. Nick says he can rely on him, but they can't rely on Dave. If they get him in here and behind the microphone, there's no guarantee he'll talk. Toadie sends Nick to get a drink. Nick leaves and passes Dave in the hall. Nick sends Dave into Toadie's booth, and then Nick closes the door behind him.
Lance is now clothed, while Amy wants a few more shots. Lance says Harold turning up broke the mood. If he had seen him like that, he'd have died. Amy says it could have been worse, it could have been his mum. Lance says if she saw him in boxer shorts with Amy there, she'd never let Amy stay over the holidays. Amy wishes Lance wasn't so uptight, every time she goes to touch him, he backs away. It makes her feel like he doesn't want her. Lance assures her it's not true, but he's never been around someone as full on as her. It makes him a bit nervous. Amy understands.
AMY: But if you're nervous now, wait until next week when we're living under the same roof.
Amy kisses Lance's neck while he looks nervous.
Toadie holds Dave's phone away out of arm's reach and won't give it back until Dave agrees to an interview. Dave wants to speak to the manager.
TOADIE: Half an hour, that's all I'm asking.
DAVE: I don't have half an hour, and even if I did I wouldn't be wasting it with the likes of you.
Toadie locks the door and swallows the key.
DAVE: What are you doing? This is insane! You look like a normal person, you sound like a normal person but you're an out and out lunatic!
TOADIE: Not exactly the type of person you want to be stuck in a small confined space with, hey Dave. Now I didn't want it to come to this, I tried it your way Dave. I asked nicely, I even begged, well now I'm desperate. Sit down. No talkies, no walkies.