Spa
The beautician places a towel over a relaxed Susan's face. Rachel is listening to her earphone, and Stingray creeps in and pulls them out and sticks his finger in her ear to annoy her. Susan hears something and sits up but the beautician stands in her line of sight. Rachel smiles at Stingray and closes her eyes again. Scott moves out and Karl walks in, facemasked and with a gel pack over his eyes. He feels his way into the room with a white rose and surprises Susan with a facemask kiss and the flower.

Weirdly, if you watch carefully, as Susan gasps in surprise there's a noise dubbed over the top which isn't from this take! It's a Susan sound, but her mouth certainly isn't making it... Cue the twilight zone...

Karl kisses Susan's nose and says he'll see her in the sauna in ten.

He feels his way out of the room, past Rachel, as Susan sniffs the rose - and makes yet ANOTHER noise which isn't from this take! In this take, she just smiles and opens her mouth - but there's definitely a dubbing thing going on here.

The General Store
Janelle hands Sky a present - booties for the baby.

JANELLE: Call me nan.

The booties don't look like booties. They look more like badly knitted burglar sacks for very very small thieves. Janelle admits she strayed from the pattern, but she got the colours right. Goodo.

SKY: Oh, nan, I love them. Thank you.

Janelle is delighted. As she turns to leave Carmella wanders into the shop. In stunning style, Janelle says 'hello sister' and kneels before Carmella, crossing her chest. Can I just say here how much I love love love Janelle?? She used to really bug me, but she has really developed as a character, and the Timminses are really set to be a classic family on this show, I think.

Janelle needs to talk to Carmella - she knows that Carmella understands all things moral about the big bloke, doesn't she?? So she believes that - in the case of unwed mothers - that the bloke should get off his backside and pop the question, doesn't she? Carmella thinks it's important for a child to have both parents, but says every situation is different.

JANELLE: And some situations need the wise words of a cut young nun to help those involved see the light?
CARMELLA: I'm happy to talk with Sky or Dylan but I'm not gonna force my opinions on them.
JANELLE: But that's what you lot are good at.

Carmella walks off. Harry appears.

JANELLE: Bad news. Sally Fields there isn't gonna give me anything.
HARRY: Pardon?
JANELLE: It's up to you and me to get Sky and Dylan to the church on time.
HARRY: I don't see that it's got anything to do with us.
JANELLE: Oh you and the nun are as bad as each other.

Nursery
Dylan and Carmella are at a nursery where Oscar is playing. The kids are waiting and excited to see Oodles of Noodles. Ned and Justine turn up and Carmella wonders if Karl's running late, but Ned explains that this is his career - it was only ever a hobby to Karl. Ouch.

Carmella says the kids wanted to see the kangaroo. Can they ask him back just this once?

JUSTINE: I'm sure your musical opinion is a big hit with the convent choir. Let's just leave this one to the professionals, yeah?

Cow.

The General Store
JANELLE: Come on, Hazza, work with me.
HAROLD: I will not force those kids into marriage.
JANELLE: No, not force. Convince.

Janelle reminds him that it means the kid's family will be together. Dylan and Elle come in, and Dylan picks up a hanky that Sky drops. Janelle comments to Harry that they're still in love but they have to get Princess Pushy out of the way. Harry thinks that Janelle's being inappropriate. But Janelle says that the kid doesn't need a Robinson as a step-parent.

Harold won't help!

The Spa of Being Sprung
Scott and Rachel are in the rose gardens deciding what to do next. Rachel is quiet and moody. Scott wants to know what's wrong, and she says she can't figure out the adult thing. How does she address a problem she doesn't understand without sounding immature? And if she doesn't say anything that's even more immature...

Scott guesses - this is about Sky, isn't it? Rachel can't stop thinking about it. She worries what will happen when he gets sick of her trying to be an adult, but he thinks she's mature. And he likes to play kiss chase!

Another badly edited scene in a couple of places - clearly two takes!! Rachey runs off and Scott catches her and they shriek in their fun outside an apartment room...where Karl appears, wrapping a towel around his waist and asking them to keep the noise down.

He sees who it is, and then Susan appears, pulling on a black gown over some negligee thing (sad reminiscing of 4411). She's stunned to see Rachel, who's just as stunned to see her step-mother. Karl just looks at Susan, and we have no idea what Stingray's doing.

Cut to later where Karl comes back out with a dressing gown, and Susan can't believe that Rachel abused her trust like this - obviously their relationship has developed if they're spending romantic weekends away. Did they ever stop seeing each other? Scott butts in - there's nothing physical going on.

SUSAN: This is a terrible betrayal.
RACHEL: Yeah. Huge. Of my dad. Remember him? The guy who died lying in your arms?
SUSAN: I never betrayed Alex.
RACHEL: Oh yeah? So what are you and Karl actually doing here, then? Just brushing up on your bongo skills?

Susan runs her hands down her arms in that protective way of hers when she's upset and nervous, and Rachel sees she has no ring on.

Susan tells her she had a massage, but Rachel thinks she just couldn't wait to take it off.

RACHEL: You just waited until he was buried before you went running back to Karl!
KARL: Rachel that is enough!
RACHEL: No! Don't you dare try and tell me what to do. You are not my father, and you - you are not my mother!
SUSAN: Rachel -
RACHEL: No! I have nothing to say to you.

Rachel runs off and Susan thinks she should go after her, but Karl suggests she they both calm down and wait til they get home. Susan looks distressed; Karl puts his arm around her and she leans into him.

Nursery
Justine very very badly sings "now I've arrived at destination me!" The kids and parents could not look less impressed. Carmella suggests a big round of applause but no-one takes part. Carmella thanks Ned and Justine anyway.

CARMELLA: Lots of new words for us to learn.
JUSTINE: Yeah, well it isn't our fault they've been brought up on a diet of Britney Spears and Australian Idol.
NED: Hey. I like Australian Idol.
CARMELLA: Yeah. And Britney's had some good moments.
JUSTINE: Yeah well some people just aren't well educated.

Carmella suggests the kids wanted to see the kangaroo. Justine calls Carmella over and wants to make sure they're still getting paid. Carmella hands her a cheque for $300 plus GST, and she strops off. Ned notices Julia, Justine's niece in the audience, and assures her that her aunty didn't mean to ignore her. Justine hurries Ned up and hands him his share - $50. Carmella watches the whole thing and keels down to see Julia. Julia admits that Justine paid her to be her niece so she looked better in front of Ned.

No.28
Karl and Susan arrive home and Susan calls for Rachel who isn't there. She wonders if they've sneaked off. Karl thinks they're good kids, but Susan reiterates again that she's fourteen and too young for an adult relationship. Karl suggests that maybe she's not having an adult relationship - he thinks Scott was telling the truth.

SUSAN: I can't believe she used Alex against me like that.

What?! You didn't see that coming?! Karl - the only sensible one in this scene - says that they were always going to take this badly. Then Susan gets guilty and we see why she's getting angsty; she admits she shouldn't have yelled. She should have been more understanding. She's done this all wrong, and should have told them. She's made a complete mess of it.

The General Store
Carmella is telling Harold she hasn't heard anything about Connor. Ned suggests asking Karl back to the band; Justine disagrees - Ned can just put on an animal costume. Carmella seduces Ned to her way of thinking with the promise of a foot massage.

Number 26
Dylan and Elle are kissing on the sofa.

JANELLE: Dylan, look out! There's a giant preying mantis on the couch.
DYLAN: Where!
JANELLE: Sorry, Elle, I didn't realise it was you.

Janelle tells them that Harry's here to get some pregnancy cook books for Sky, you know, mother of his unborn child. Harry says he wants some nice recipes. Janelle would like Sky to find a good man to cook for her - does anyone know of any eligible chefs?

ELLE: The burger-flipper at Grease Monkeys is recently single. He's nice. If you like the toothless type.

Janelle asks Elle to step into the kitchen. Janelle tells her that it's not going to last - but WHAT IS THAT!? Oh, it's the coffee machine, foot massager and facial steamer that Elle has brought round for Janelle.

JANELLE: I can't be bought Missy. I am a woman of - is that a waffle maker?

Elle also has too many frequent flyer points, which Janelle might like to use. First class, five star resort. And Elle would like to give them to someone she got along with. Janelle hugs her. They've got off on the wrong foot - and if they forgive each other, maybe they can get on.

Harry and Dylan are watching and think it's shameless. Harry leaves, and Scott and Rachel arrive home. Dylan reminds them they're in public (his arm is around hers) and they tell him that Susan already knows.

Number 30
Carmella arrives and Jus answers the door. Carmella will wait for Ned, who is washing his feet after Justine's massage. Jus is desperate to get her out the house, but Carmella ain't buying it.

JUSTINE: Look, we don't want a nun in the band. So this little 'sister act' thing you've going on here is a little bit nineties, don't you think...

We know exactly what Carmella thinks because she pushes Jus against the wall and reminds her that it's not just the man upstairs she's friends with. She knows about Julia and the $50. What else has she been getting up to? Ned would also like to know, please...

Carmella will go make tea. And now, ladies and gentlemen, the award for the most STUPID line of the episode goes to:

NED: Were you doing the foot massages just to distract me?

You mean, like, they were magic? They stopped you using your brain? Oh, hang on, wait...

The General Store
Harry keeps telling Sky that some men are stubborn, but she says that Dylan knows where she is if he wants to talk. Elle comes in - she wants a latte and a talk. She apologises for the other day for being selfish, and doesn't want anything to get in the way of their friendship. So does Sky. They will sit and have hot chocolate!

Elle would also like advice on how to get Janelle onside - she loves Sky!

SKY: I fell pregnant with her grandchild.
ELLE: I think I'll be needing marshmallows with that.

Number 30
Just says she's been doing loads of work that Ned doesn't know about - promotions, phonecalls, getting gigs, booking things. Ned doesn't think it explains things. She says she wants things to work out for them - but Ned thinks this is a professional relationship.

JUSTINE: And you call foot massages professional.

And - I was wrong. THIS is the most stupid line of the episode:

NED: I went with those because you said it would help my performance.

Jus explains that she hired Julia to get to Ned, and she knew his was a major talent. She thinks this is the beginning of them, on stage and off, but he's not having any of it. He tells her to get out.

NED: You either get out now, or I will unleash the nun on you. Your choice.

Jus leaves. That's the most intelligent thing Ned has done since...since... Well, possibly since he was born. Carmella and Ned chat and have a moment. But Ned was about to make a stir fry and would she like to stay as a thank you? She would - but she'd like to keep the whole psycho nun thing between the two of them.

Number 26
Janelle says no way can Rachel live there - she needs to sort the fight out, but Rachey says it's more than a fight. Scott tells Janelle that they busted Susan at the spa, too - she's with Karl.

JANELLE: Susie-Q and the doc are back on?
RACHEL: Yeah, it's like my dad didn't even exist.
JANELLE: Oh, no, no no no. Hey - she was so cut up when your dad passed away.
RACHEL: Yeah for about two seconds. And now here she is yelling at us for sneaking around when she's going off and doing exactly the same thing.

There's a knock at the door and it's Susan for Rachel - she wants to talk. Rachel refuses and says that Janelle has known for weeks. Janelle and Susan disagree in front of Rachel about their approach to their relationship

SUSAN: Encouraging this is irresponsible.

And then Janelle does a one-eighty and tells Rachel she can stay as long as she likes; Susan doesn't think Lyn will agree to it. She's furious.

No.28
Rachel stands in the kitchen, staring at a photo of her father. A promo pic, by the way. Susan comes home and is surprised to see Rachel there. Yeah - me too, she was next door just now. Did she get a transporter?

Hey - that would be so cool to have one.

Rachel is crying. And asks how long Susan and Karl have been seeing each other. Susan tells her two weeks, and she wants Rachel to know that it doesn't mean she doesn't love Alex. But they have to move on with their lives.

RACHEL: But you're not moving on, Susan, you're moving backwards. What happens next? You gonna throw me and Zeke out to make way for your real kids?

And therein lies her insecurity. It's not the fact that Susan kept it from her. It's not that she's with Karl. It's that she's a scared kid who's lost both her parents, and now might lose Susan to her 'real' family again.

Susan tells her that they are her real kids - she loves them all the same.

RACHEL: You know what, when Katya wanted custody of us I stood up for you. I couldn't leave you here all alone, I thought it would be too sad. I thought that you needed us.
SUSAN: Oh, I do. I do need you. I can't imagine living without you.
RACHEL: Well get used to it.
SUSAN: I don't want you to go anywhere, Rachel.
RACHEL: I'm sorry, Susan, but I can't live with someone I have no respect for, and who obviously has no respect for me.
SUSAN: Oh that's not true...
RACHEL: Right, well, if you thought that getting back together with Karl was the right thing to do, why did you keep it a secret?

And Susan doesn't say a word. Why? Why didn't she say 'because we wanted to make sure this was for real before we made another change to your lives?'

RACHEL: Because you knew that it would hurt us. But you went ahead and you did it anyway.

But then - the same thing could be said for you and Scott, Rachey...

SUSAN: Please, we have to talk about this, let me explain...
RACHEL: I have nothing left to say to you!!
SUSAN: No, Rachel, please, I know you're upset...
RACHEL: No. You wait for Zeke to get back from footie camp. And then you'll know what upset really looks like.

And with that, Rachel leaves. And Susan stands behind the door looking as lost and as terrified as we've ever seen her.

Line of the episode:
JANELLE: I can't be bought Missy. I am a woman of - is that a waffle maker?

Best performance of the episode:
Caitlin Stasey. Just wonderful today.

Best 'Rock On' moment:
JANELLE: Dylan, look out! There's a giant preying mantis on the couch.
DYLAN: Where!
JANELLE: Sorry, Elle, I didn't realise it was you.

The scene that TPTB forgot to include:
The one where Susan didn't have the black gown on...