Tyler and Piper are on Tyler's boat in the marina.
PIPER: Hey, guys! So, this is a thing...we're going out on the board.
PIPER: Yup! So, um...what you want to do, this is a bit of a tutorial on how to boat...
Caption: HOW TO BOAT
PIPER: You...pump the petrol with the thing...
Caption: PUMP THE PETROL WITH THE THING?
PIPER: ...and then you pull the choke...
Caption: PULL THE CHOKE
TYLER: You pull it.
PIPER: Pull the choke!
Caption: Pull THE CHOKE!
Caption: PIPE UP (with a horn)
Piper and Tyler are now below deck.
PIPER: Hey, guys! So, as you can see, we are still on the boat...and we are still afloat...we obviously got the boat started and all the driving boat things with the choke...
TYLER: Mmm- hmm...yup, and...?
PIPER: And now we have weighed anchor!
Tyler mimes an anchor.
TYLER: Who is the most famous sailor of all time?
PIPER: Oooh, spontaneous trivia! Uh...Columbus.
Tyler opens a plastic bag and eats a leaf out of it. He looks down at his arm muscles and flexes them.
TYLER: Get it, now?
PIPER: Oh my...listen, why did we have to stop off and buy spinach? Is this why, now? OK, is he really strong?
TYLER: Very strong.
PIPER: And does he have to eat a very specific vegetable to get all his vitamins to do his...thing...
Tyler puffs himself up.
PIPER: Is he also really well- known with people over the age of eighty?
TYLER: Come on. He's a *classic*.
PIPER: Is it Popeye?
TYLER:(still eating spinach) Yes.
Later, Piper is wearing headphones and trying to open the window.
PIPER: I need air, Ty...
TYLER: Ladies and gentlemen! It's time for trivia! Did you know that the saying 'three squares meals a day' is an old English term?
TYLER: It is. It means when they serve up meals on a ship they're on square plates.
PIPER:(unenthusiastically) Wow, that's awesome.
TYLER: Yep. And did you know that the term 'Mayday' is a French word?
PIPER: Oh, wow.
He pulls on her headphones.
PIPER: Obviously, this is distracting you.
She takes off the headphones.
TYLER: That's alright, I'll wear it, then.
He puts on the headphones.
PIPER: Oh, God...
TYLER: It means, "M'aidez, m'aidez, m'aidez"...help me!
PIPER: Yeah, Ty, can you...
TYLER: Help me!
PIPER: Help me!
TYLER: It's what I said.
PIPER: No, serious, m'aidez, I don't feel good. I feel sick.
TYLER: You've got the same look as Aaron is when he...steps on...
PIPER: Can we go back, please?
PIPER: Because I just said I feel sick! I FEEL SICK!
TYLER: Are you sure it's not getting too...CHOP- PY?!
He swings her back and fore.
PIPER: Stop, Tyler, STOP IT, you're going overboard, stop!
TYLER: M'aidez, m'aidez, m'aidez, I'm going overboard...
PIPER: This is the end of Pipe Up....
TYLER:...because Tyler's going overboard...
PIPER:(whispers into the camera) I'm going to push him overboard and I'm going to make it look like an accident.
PIPER: This is the end of the Pipe Up, sorry for a very abrupt ending. Hopefully next week I'll be on dry land and less sway- ey.
Tyler is messing around in the background, much to Piper's disgust.