Rosie wants to date both Frazer and Paul so she can work out who she really wants to be with
Zeke says he wants nothing more to do with Katya if she doesn't come back home
Pepper lays down some rules for Frazer and Paul
Steiger catches Katya and tells her she has nowhere left to run
Walker State Forest
Steiger tells Katya that she's breached her bail conditions by failing to check in and he'll have to report her. Zeke isn't happy but Katya comforts him, telling him it'll be okay. Bree lays into her mum for dating a cop – they can't be trusted! Janelle tells Katya she'll fix it.
Steiger hasn't got through to the local PD yet, giving Janelle time to tell him not to be a cop 24/7. Can't he bend the rules once?
STEIGER: Sorry. No can do.
Steiger eventually gets through and introduces himself as Janelle looks glum.
Pepper watches as Frazer plays poker over the internet, somehow not noticing that the Chrissie decorations are still up (but then again I'm not sure what day it is in Neighboursland). Frazer is doing very badly and, on his last card, wonders whether to fold or chance it. Pepper encourages him to give it a whirl. Just as well as the card gives Frazer a royal flush – the hottest thing you can get in poker, apparently. This calls for a celebration! Paul walks in and stands behind them (An extra watches what's going on and looks at Paul for a few seconds as if to say “Weren't you in River City once?”) Paul thinks it's cute when he finds out they're celebrating a win on a computer game.
PAUL: Small things, small minds…
Frazer thinks he must be scared to spy on the opposition. Pepper announces Frazer's $1000 win and Paul is unimpressed (that's just loose change to him). Paul wants to know how Frazer will perform with what's really at stake – he holds all the aces there. Frazer tells him to keep talking – he loves long odds. Paul says he's out of his league.
FRAZER: You're sweating, hop along.
PAUL: Oh, very original. Don't try and match wits with me, Junior - you're seriously underpowered.
Paul walks away.
PEPPER: That Mr Robinson, he's so evil.
Frazer thinks he's just had the biggest fluke of all time and he won't be doing that again.
Paul is on the phone to Lassiter's, asking for all staff to attend a meeting at 10am in regard to the most important night of his life (surely an exaggeration?)
Walker State Forest
Steiger and Janelle arrive back at their tent. Janelle is still raging about Steiger dobbing Katya in – she should have listened to her kids and never dated a cop! They always following the rules. Steiger retorts that he has a permanent crick in his neck from looking the other way when one of her lot decide to flout the law! And he's not just talking about Kim but her whole family – especially her!
JANELLE: What've I done?
STEIGER (counts them off on his fingers): Oh, let's see; traffic infringements, licensing offences, littering, false reports…oh and let's not forget attempted arson!
Janelle thinks they were minor indiscretions – she should've known he'd throw them back in her face. He didn't have to throw Katya in jail as Karl and Susan were prepared to keep on eye on her. Steiger reminds her that Katya skipped bail and is involved in some very serious crime! He can't just turn a blind eye – he's a cop!
Janelle, tidying everything up, angrily pulls her blanket from beneath him and inadvertently knocks over his crossbow, which shoots an arrow into one of the ute's tyres, deflating it.
JANELLE: Now look what you've done.
He thinks he's such a great cop and yet he left a loaded crossbow lying around! Steiger says he was distracted by her wayward daughter. Janelle orders him to change it so they can get out of there. Steiger thinks it's no wonder her ex left her. He's not her tamed poodle so he's going to stay right here!
JANELLE: Well, hello the He-man act! Feeling a bit inadequate, are we, because our ex ran off with a Sheila?!
Steiger tells if her that if she wants to go home that's fine. He hands her a torch and her bag (which is blatantly one of Lynnie's).
STEIGER: Road's that way – start walkin'!
Janelle knew she should've got a lift with Karl and Suse. Steiger's nothing but a waste of time! She walks off.
Nightime and Steiger's in his sleeping bag, Mozz at his feet, when Janelle crawls into the tent. Steiger asks if she was unable to find the road. Janelle informs him that she did but didn't want to give him the satisfaction. She orders him to go and sleep in the ute since she left her tent pegs behind.
STEIGER: Funny, that.
Janelle is freezing so gets under some of the covers. As she thrashes about, trying to get comfortable, she instructs him to stay in his own half.
Mozz starts barking and Steiger doesn't know why – unless he's barking at someone who followed Janelle through the bush! As it happens Janelle did hear some strange noises…
Steiger goes out to investigate. Janelle hears some wolf noises and calls softly for Steiger. Clearly afraid, she calls to him again. He appears behind her, shining the torch from beneath his chin, and starts yelling, making her scream in terror. Janelle calls him an idiot and Steiger thinks it serves her right for what she said about Chris. Then she reminds him of his cracks about the Timmins and he concedes they're even.
Janelle realises Steiger knew Mozz was only barking at a possum all along. Steiger apologises and Janelle says sorry too.
JANELLE: Here we are breaking up and we haven't even snogged – not properly.
Steiger admits he's glad she hid the tent pegs – it saved him the bother of trying to do it.
JANELLE: See – deep down you're as sneaky as the rest of us.
STEIGER: You smooth talker.
They snog and pull the covers over their heads.
The next morning Janelle awakens to find Steiger gone. She goes outside to find he's cooking up brekkie for them. He tells her he couldn't bear to wake her as she looked so beautiful. Janelle notices that he's wearing a ‘Sherbet' t-shirt (a Seventies band that look a bit like the Bay City Rollers and do not actually exist). Janelle realises he's a true fan - he has all their vinyl and CDs! He also wore their tragic Seventies platforms, satin baggies and vest combo back in the day.
JANELLE: Could you be anymore perfect?
Bree storms in and runs into Karl and Susan, who wonder if she's here to see Toadie. Bree doesn't answer – she's mad with her mum for staying all night in the country with Steiger. Pepper joins the conversation to hear Bree rage about Steiger dobbing Katya in when he wasn't even on police duty. Pepper and Susan remind her that is Steiger's job. Bree is convinced Zeke will never speak to her again since she dobbed.
SUSAN: More serious than hiding out in the back of Steiger's ute?
Bree ignores her and informs Pepper that she doesn't want Steiger to be part of her family. Pepper doesn't want him and Janelle to be together either – Janelle is stealing a married man. Chris' estrangement from him is only temporary and she'll come to her senses. They argue over whose parent has hooks in who until Susan breaks them up, reminding them that they have more important things to think about (like Karl's facial hair). Susan asks Pepper to tell Rosie they'll see her at the police station and Pepper leaves. Bree thanks Karl and Susan for that – she needed it.
SUSAN (bemused): Anytime.
Rosie thinks the dating idea is ridiculous but Pepper shows her one of the plusses – Paul has given her a huge bunch of flowers, with instructions to bring her favourite one to dinner that night. Pepper thinks it's so romantic - tonight will be wonderful. Rosie doesn't think Paul'll get carried away; it's only their first date.
Meanwhile Paul is telling his staff he wants things done to the letter or else heads will roll. Cut to…
Frazer isn't happy to see Paul's given her flowers and wishes her a truly horrendous evening. Rosie receives another gift from Paul.
Paul wants the staff to be attentive without being obsequious (adjective characterized by or showing servile complaisance or deference; fawning: e.g. an obsequious bow.) Boy, Paul did learn some big words when he was in prison. He wants the staff to be classy at all times - no one likes a try-hard (even though Paul seems to be trying very hard.)
Paul's note informs Rosie that a limo will pick her up. Frazer looks worried. Rosie discovers he's sent her a dress and it fits exactly.
Walker State Forest
Janelle and Steiger are hunting with the crossbow. Steiger kisses her then they see a pig. Steiger tries to shoot it but can't and Janelle asks why.
STEIGER: Well, it's weird, but the whole world looks different this morning. I think I love that animal.
JANELLE: Oh, that is so sweet! And so soft…
She kisses him then grabs the crossbow.
JANELLE: Yummy bacon sandwiches.
Rosie tells Katya (along with Susan, Karl and Zeke) that the only way Kat might avoid jail is if she cooperates. The police really want the major players, not her. Katya gives Rosie her final word – she can't.
Rosie tells Susan she tried and Karl asks if she'll apply for bail. Rosie will but it's a hopeless call. She implores Katya to reconsider. Zeke demands to know why his sister's doing this. Susan says they've all gone out on a limb for her. Katya explains that Guy'll come after her if she testifies. If she keeps quiet in custody she'll be safe. She couldn't live with herself if something happened to her family.
Rosie enters the restaurant, holding a red rose. To her surprise she and Paul are the only customers. Paul lights a candle and tells her that her table awaits. He thinks the gown looks stunning on her. Rosie asks where the other customers are but Paul tells her that tonight only they exist. He clicks his fingers and someone starts playing a grand piano.
Frazer is playing Playstation when Pepper appears, announcing they have a dinner date to sabotage. Frazer reminds her that she's supposed to be neutral, being the MC. Pepper is simply trying to keep the game going for as long as she can. Frazer won't cheat; he wants to win this on his own merits. Pepper points out that Paul's gonna be doing a whole lot of cheating – he's probably seducing Rosie now with expensive gifts. Frazer informs her that if that's what Rosie wants, so be it. He won't play dirty. Pepper won't let Paul win, even if Fraze will. She's off to do some discreet surveillance.
BREE: I'm sorry I broke the dobbing code but I had a big hairy authority figure standing over me. And Steiger was there too.
Zeke laughs, despite everything, and tells her he's not mad. Bree is sure Katya will speak up after a few days locked up but Zeke thinks she won't while there's a chance of them being hurt. Bree can see her point.
Janelle arrives back and Bree thinks it's about time. Janelle tells her about the puncture but Bree thinks there's loads of ways she could've still got home. She hopes she gave Steiger the push after what he did to Kat.
Steiger comes in with more of their camping stuff and Janelle points out his t-shirt (Bree thinks they're a chicks group). Janelle tries to bribe Bree and Zeke to make themselves scarce but Bree refuses and Steiger can't stay anyway. Janelle follows him outside for a goodbye pash on the doorstep. Steiger promises to call her.
Janelle is still full of the joys when she comes in and Bree wants a bucket. She was on Janelle's side earlier but then Steiger reminded her of how much of a cop he is. Janelle tells her he makes her so happy – can she try to be pleased? Bree will try.
Pepper spies on Paul as he tells Rosie it's a 7-course meal (Rosie is well acquainted with gourmet food, being a Cammeniti). When they're served oysters Rosie sees that there are two pearl earrings on the plate. Pepper relays this news to Frazer.
PEPPER (over phone): Frazer, Frazer!
FRAZER: I'm fine, just stop calling me!
Zeke pops round to do some cleaning to keep his mind off Katya being remanded in custody. Frazer can't concentrate on his work and Zeke says he'd be worried too in his situation (Pepper has told the whole world about it). Zeke thinks it sounds like a duel.
FRAZER: Except Paul Robinson is armed with rocket launchers and I've got a pea shooter!
ZEKE: Word up from your peeps? You just gotta be you.
Frazer finds the Vanilla Ice routine not quite Zeke and Zeke tells him that's the point - he was just making a fool of himself when he tried to be cool and Bree saw right through it! He thinks Rosie's intelligent enough to see right through Paul. Alex always said that if you stay true to yourself you can't go wrong.
FRAZER: Did he also say true love wins through in the end?
ZEKE: Yeah. And I believe it – don't you?
FRAZER: Fingers crossed my friend…
Zeke crosses his fingers.
FRAZER: Did your dad ever say give up because Paul always wins?
They do a cool handshake thing and Frazer cracks a smile.
Susan is annoyed that the remand centre won't even tell her if Katya's doing okay. Karl thinks that at least she's safe. Susan notices that Karl's more grumpy than usual (and it's not because he's lost his razor). He tells her that the organic vegetable shop's prices are outrageous! Susan had thought it was something serious.
Janelle comes in and thanks them for giving Bree a lift back. Karl is waiting for her to apologise on Bree's behalf for getting Zeke to stow away. Janelle does, kind of, although she's too wrapped up in other things to pay much attention. Susan asks her what she really wants.
Janelle knows that things have been a bit ropey between them and it's time to fix it. Both Janelle and Susan miss Lyn so they have to put all the paternity stuff behind them. If Karl forgets her trying to sue them she'll forget he mixed up the dates and she can reinstall them at number one in her favourite neighbours index!
Janelle wants to talk to them about Steiger – Bree's too young for this. Karl jumps up, saying he's too young too and abandons Susan with Janelle.
JANELLE: Of course, you've gotta tell me about Karl going all beardy-weirdy…and Katya joinin' the jailbird house…But my story first. Buckle up, kiddo – this is hot stuff!
Susan looks like she'd much rather be anywhere else on earth but here.
Pepper spies Paul and Rosie dancing and begs Rosie to stay strong, although she doesn't know how she'll not to give in. Suddenly some staff members find her and Pepper leaves.
Rosie tells Paul she wishes this perfect evening didn't have to end. Paul says it doesn't have to; they could go on to wherever she likes…the penthouse suite? Rosie thinks he'll have to check availability but he tells her there's no need – he already has champers on ice and silk sheets on the bed…
ROSIE: Don't move.
She slips her dress off, to Paul's obvious delight.
Then she throws it in his face.
ROSIE: You can take that back. And your silk sheets…That's all tonight's been about, hasn't it? Getting me into bed.
He tells her she has it all wrong.
ROSIE: You know what? You're getting less sexy by the second.
Like everyone else watching this some Lassiter's staff can't keep the smiles from their faces and Paul shouts at them to get back to work, then heaves a sigh.