- Karl tells Toadie that both he and Murray the turkey are on probation.
- Helen tells Phil that he's being too cautious over Ruth, and he should grab the opportunity with both hands.
Lots of the residents - Phil, Hannah, Toadie, Lance, Darren, Libby, Sarah, Cath, Marlene, Madge and Anne - are packed into the front room for a carol service, all singing 'Hark the Herald Angels Sing' whilst Harold, Billy and Ruth play tuba, violin and piano respectively.
Anne is looking over at Billy as he plays. Toadie notices and nudges Lance, who grins. They all clap and cheer when they finish.
Mal, Karl and Susan are still at home - Karl and Mal aren't ready to go and Susan is clearly impatient. She tries to hurry the boys on, as she wants to take some photos of Billy playing.
MAL: As if playing carols isn't embarrassing enough!
KARL: They're still going over there, dear. By the time we get there, they'll probably be in tune!
SUSAN: That's enough, both of you.
Mal tells Susan that the turkey has a name - Murray. Susan says that now it's named, they won't be able to kill it. Karl says they'll cook two chickens up instead and no-one will know the difference! Susan is upset that Mal and Karl won't be at home for Christmas as they're going to continue the building work at Lou's Place, but they insist that they will be.
MAL: We'll should be home by about 11, just in time for lunch.
SUSAN: Yeah, just like we were going to be in time for the carols(!)
Karl says that they only have two hours work to do, and Darren will be helping too. The chickens Karl was holding leaked on him and he wonders if he should change his shirt.
SUSAN: It doesn't matter! Scruffy, late, chicken stained - who cares? Just get out the door!
She shepherds them out - Karl singing on the way!
Everyone is taking a break and refreshments are being passed around. Marlene and Harold are bickering over whether one of the lyrics is 'new born king' or 'new found king'. Karl, Susan and Mal enter.
KARL: Sorry we're late - Susan took forever to get organised!
Susan looks at him in disbelief! Phil spots Karl's dirty shirt straight away and asks if he couldn't afford a clean one! Phil offers some sandwiches to Toadie and Hannah, and Toadie takes a huge handful.
PHIL: Hey hey hey, settle down!
TOADIE: I'm a growing boy!
Billy comes over to Toadie and asks his advice over Anne. Toadie instantly turns to look in her direction.
BILLY: Don't look at her!
Billy wonders if the video stuffed things up with Anne, but Toadie tells him that she can't keep her eyes off him. On the other side of the room, Anne is with Lance.
ANNE: Should I go over and talk to him?
LANCE: If you want.
ANNE: I really messed things up with the video.
LANCE: Yeah, you have.
ANNE: Do you reckon?
LANCE: Well I don't know! Why don't you go and ask him, don't ask me!
Phil and Ruth exchange a joke, and Toadie and Lance stand together. Toadie asks Lance to keep Billy away from him as he's driving him nuts! Lance says that Anne's the same. Toadie realises Billy and Anne like each other and tells Lance to grab some CDs and go over to Number 28.
TOADIE: We're going to get these two fools together and put them out of their misery!
Toadie is going through Lance's CDs and is surprised that he listens to thrash music - Toadie's only got half of what Lance has got. Lance says he can borrow some. Toadie picks up a Header CD and Lance tells him he won it in a competition. Toadie reckons it's perfect - Billy likes poppy stuff. He tells Lance to look through the CDs and see if he can find something Anne would like. Lance is confused as to why Toadie would want to give Anne a CD.
TOADIE: We wrap this up, all nice and pretty and chuck it under my tree - to Billy, from Anne. Then we find one for Anne, put it under your tree-
LANCE: From Billy!
TOADIE and LANCE: Yesssss!
They shake hands on their masterplan.
The rest of the residents are singing 'Away in a Manger'. When the song finishes, everyone claps. Phil pops over to Ruth, who's playing piano.
PHIL: Need a page turner?
RUTH: Can you read music?
They both laugh and Phil tells Ruth that he's preparing mince pies for the Christmas party and she offers to help him. Toadie and Lance return - Toadie is impressed that nobody missed them. Lance goes to put the CD under the tree and asks if Anne is looking.
TOADIE: No, she's too busy drooling over babyface.
Billy pulls his face when Susan takes his photo. Marlene says it's nice to see everyone so happy. Harold spots Mal and Cath pashing in the corner and blows on his tuba! Everyone looks over and laughs. Marlene gathers everyone together to sing 'O Come, All Ye Faithful'.
Outside Number 28
Murray the turkey is in a cage outside.
Harold is pleased at how well the evening went. Madge says she doesn't know how she could've doubted him in the first place. Harold tells Madge that he can't wait any longer and he wants to open their presents! They both rush over to the tree.
MADGE: You know, if anyone had told me last Christmas that this year I'd be sitting under a tree with you...
HAROLD: You'd have thought you'd have gone to heaven!
They both laugh and Madge is pleased when she opens Harold's gift - it's an antique. Harold is apologetic that he couldn't afford much. Madge has bought Harold a huge photo frame for his future, and hopes she'll feature in it.
HAROLD: I don't see how you couldn't. Not now I'm falling in love with you again.
Madge is stunned.
MADGE: You know I've never fallen out of love with you.
HAROLD: Merry Christmas, Madge.
MADGE: Merry Christmas, Harold.
Ruth unwraps a truly HIDEOUS shirt, which she is rapt with. (Maybe a trip to Specsavers is in order for next year's presents?!) Lance is sure there's another present lying about, and Ruth tells them that she's sure their father's presents are in the post - but the lie doesn't cut it with the twins. Lance pulls out the CD 'from Billy'. Ruth is trying to hurry them along, but Lance is dying to know who it is from.
Anne is amazed - it's from Billy, so he must really like her. She feels awful that she hasn't got him anything.
Susan unwraps a vase from her aunt - it used to be her mother's and she's stoked to have something come down through the family. The rest of the family aren't as impressed! Toadie thanks 'Mummy Susan' for his present, and Susan says she wanted him to have something to open considering he already unwrapped Angie's.
Karl is pestering to open his present but they let Billy open his CD first. Toadie asks who it is off, but Billy evades the question and tells Karl to open his present. Mal reaches over and grabs it off him.
MAL: Woooooo!! Merry Christmas Billy-boy, with lots of love from ANNE!
Everyone teases Billy and he grabs it back, telling them to calm down. Billy feels awful for not getting Anne anything. Darren arrives and Karl opens his only present - it's full of workman tools. Karl is very pleased.
SUSAN: We're behind you in whatever you do and now you might even be able to do it...quite well!
Karl, Mal and Darren leave for work.
Number 24 - Back Garden
Madge and Lou are setting up for the party. Madge says she's spoken to Scott and Charlene - Daniel's got his first bike. Harold is making a non-alcoholic punch, and Lou thinks it needs some punch to it! Harold says he's doing it so everyone can enjoy it, and Madge tells Lou off for teasing Harold.
Lou pulls Madge to one side and gives her a Christmas present - some pearls. Madge is shocked.
MADGE: They must've cost a fortune.
LOU: Is that a problem?
MADGE: When I'm married to Harold, yes, it is.
LOU: Oh, he won't be offended, will he? Not unless, of course, his gift pales by comparison!
MADGE: That's a horrible thing to say.
Lou tells her that he's pleased she and Harold are back together, and urges her to take the pearls - it's a friendship gift. Madge thanks him.
Phil is messing with mince pie filling, whilst Ruth is hunting for a pie tin. Phil thinks a pie tin is pointless - he's just going to bung them on a tray! He demonstrates his slapdash method, whilst Helen watches on, amused.
RUTH: They'll look appalling!
PHIL: No, they won't.
RUTH: You've got to mould the pastry into proper pie cases and then do little designs round the edges.
PHIL: What's the fun if you do it like that?!
RUTH: If you do it your way, no-one is going to want to eat them because they'll end up looking like little bundles of dog's droppings!
PHIL: That's disgusting!
RUTH: Look, will you let me show you what to do?
PHIL: No, I can manage.
RUTH: Give me some pastry.
PHIL: I said I can manage, all right?
HELEN: Children! Children! If we're playing pastries, let's play nicely together.
HANNAH: It's like being back in kindergarten.
Phil relents and lets Ruth show him her way. Hannah and Helen leave for the party.
Lots of the residents are in the living room and kitchen, all bearing food for the party. Toadie grabs Lance for a strategy talk. Billy approaches Anne and gives her an envelope, saying it's not much. Anne is surprised - he's given her heaps already. She passes him an envelope as well and the two help Susan with some dishes.
Toadie is pleased that the plan has gone well, but Lance says it'll only work if neither of them mention the CD. Toadie wonders how long they'll keep that up for. Lance is exasperated!
Number 24 - Back Garden
Lou is working on the BBQ. Billy tells Anne that his family gave him heaps when they found out the card was from Anne. Harold pushes past them to speak to Lou. Anne is suprised - she just gave him the card. Billy explains that he meant the CD. Madge rushes out and pushes past them to get to Harold and Lou!
ANNE: Hang on, don't you mean the one you gave me?
BILLY: Erm, I didn't give you a CD, no.
Toadie and Lance appear outside and watch the conversation. Anne and Billy are confused.
BILLY: I don't get it, what's going on?
Billy turns and sees Toadie, who attempts to make a quick getaway. Billy and Anne are furious, and chase after the pair.
Lou and Harold are arguing over Lou's Christmas present to Madge. Lou says that someone ought to be spoiling Madge. Harold tells him to keep his affections in check!
LOU: Feeling a bit threatened, are we?!
Madge tells them to cut it out - or she'll call the party off!
Anne is berating Lance - she already stuffed up over the video, and now this on top!
LANCE: Billy's going to feel dumb as well.
ANNE: So that makes it all better?! We can both look dumb together?
LANCE: Something in common!
Anne is not impressed!
Round the corner, Billy is angry at Toadie. Billy tells him that he's not his mate anymore - Toadie makes him look like a kook all of the time. He's sick of being dragged into his scams and being made the butt of the joke, and the person who ends up in trouble. Billy warns that Toadie can go on holiday to Angie's by himself, and be bored. Toadie is confused.
BILLY: You don't need a high IQ to work it out. You can start looking for a new best mate, MATE.
Anne watches as Billy storms off and blames Lance. Helen comes over and asks if they've seen the dessert. Lance says that Ruth must still be with Phil. Helen sends him over to get them - and asks him to bring Santa back with him. After Lou and Harold squabbled so much, Madge roped Phil in to be Santa instead!
ANNE: Make sure you tell him what a good boy you've been this year(!)
Phil and Ruth take their mince pies out of the oven. Phil concedes that he should've made his mince pies Ruth's way.
RUTH: Too stubborn for your own good.
PHIL: I'm not normally. It's only because you're so bossy!
RUTH: Well, I'm not usually this bossy either. It's only because you are SO infuriat...
They look at each and both laugh.
PHIL: We argue over the silliest of things, don't we?
They pause and look at each other.
RUTH: Come on, we should get this organised.
PHIL: Why do we argue so much?
RUTH: I don't know. You enjoy the battle half the time.
PHIL: Me?! You do!
RUTH: Anyway, what would we do if we weren't fighting all the time?
PHIL: Who knows?
Phil leans in and kisses Ruth, who starts to kiss him back - just as Lance walks through the back door. He is really put out, and doesn't give Ruth chance to explain.
LANCE: No wonder Dad didn't stand a chance! Christmas day is supposed to be for families. You're not supposed to be kissing your neighbour!
Ruth tries to protest, but Lance tells her he's not blind. He shoots them a filthy glare as he storms out.
Number 24 - Back Garden
Lou is handing out BBQ fare. Susan says she'll wait for Karl and Mal, and Harold suggests his quiche as a healthier alternative. Harold and Lou continue to bicker. As Lou goes to pass behind Harold, Harold swings his arm out to point across the garden - and accidentally flings Lou into the pool! Harold protests it was an accident, whilst Billy, Anne and Hannah giggle.
LOU: An accident?! You pushed me in, you pompous twit!
Lou is furious and thinks that Harold is trying to ruin his day. Oh dear!
Karl and Mal are cheerfully arguing over the mobile phone. Karl says that if Mal pitched in, they'd be finished by now. Darren wonders who's not pitching in now! He good naturedly throws a dustsheet at Mal, who flings it on the floor. Mal finishes joking with Karl and then turns to carry on with his work. Mal catches his foot on the discarded dustsheet, causing him to tumble into a stepladder. He lands on the floor and a plank holding their paint and tools drops onto his neck.
Karl and Darren pull the plank off Mal's neck but Mal can't speak. Darren rings for an ambulance and Karl tells him that Mal's got a crushed windpipe and isn't breathing.
KARL: Mal, just try to stay calm, all right?
DARREN: Stay calm?! He's not getting any air! He's not going to make it 'til the ambulance arrives.
KARL: JUST STOP PANICKING!
DARREN: Yeah, but if he stays like that he's going to DIE! You're a doctor, DO SOMETHING!
Karl looks anguished.