We open with Piper wearing a party hat and blowing a party horn. Two helium balloons are behind her.
Caption: PIPE UP
PIPER: Hey guys, this is Piper here! So, it's my birthday in, like, two weeks, so I wanted to pre- record this video because (affects proud voice) I'm going to be really busy on my birthday, like, hanging out with all my friends...(Back to her normal voice) So, I've been thinking about what presents I want...there's the, you know, the usu- ...the typical...
She makes air quotes.
PIPER: ...the typical presents...so, a new phone, a new camera would be really good...um, a roof for my car! This book..."Boy 21"...it's about a boy...who's twenty- one... Apart from all the obvious stuff, I was thinking, what would be *the best* thing I could get, like, if I was cutting into a birthday cake, what would I wish for? Side note, you know when you're cutting into a birthday cake? And, like, if you touch the bottom, something bad's going to happen? Well, in my family, if you touched the bottom of the cake, then you had to kiss the nearest boy!
She kisses a helium balloon.
PIPER: Can you imagine, like, being five years old, and just like, *mortified* by that? Half the time it was my dad!
She puts her thumbs up to the camera.
PIPER: So my friend Magda, in her family, if she was cutting and touched the bottom of the cake, then all the fairies would die!
She claps her hands.
PIPER: Dead! Dead! Oh my God, they're all dying! And my friend Joan, in her family, if she touched the bottom of the cake, then all her babies were going to be green!
Piper rocks an imaginary baby in her arms.
PIPER: Cute! (Makes a face) Argh! It's green!
PIPER: Anyway, yeah, back to wishes! I was thinking if I had like three wishes, what would I wish for? My wish number one...there's this chick called Angelina who Paige was boxing with and she got really hurt, um, and we're all really worried about her, so I wish that she has a really fast recovery. Moving on to wish number two...my friend Angus, his mum's really sick at the moment, and I just want her to get better as well, so Angus can get back to a normal life. Um, and my wish number three...would be...to go back in time and save Josh and Pop from the explosion.
She tears up.
PIPER: I'm going to spend my first birthday without Josh. And...I've just been thinking about all the time I spent away from my family in Canada...and having these, like, amazing life experiences...but if I had known that I wasn't going to have that much time with Josh, then...I just really wish that he was here. Um...(through tears)...I just really miss my brother...sorry...
She gathers herself.
PIPER: Anyway, guys, um, that's it for me for the week. I'll let you guys know in two weeks' time how my birthday goes...I don't know what my family's doing or whatever. But feel free to leave birthday comments down below...I'll see you guys next week.
PIPER: Au revoir!